Blind Nostalgia
by Seripithus
Summary: A drunk and not-so-valiant member of the Alliance is sent out on a mission to capture a Blood Elf Paladin, who's stolen incriminating Alliance documents, and bring her to justice. Enticed, he excepts, only to be thrown into the romance of his life.
1. Prologue

_Rated M for later chapters._

_Violence, language and suggestive themes._

_**I don't own Warcraft or any of the places mentioned or NPC's named. Original characters and plot are mine, however.**  
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**To my dearest daughters,**

**Happy Birthday, Arìs, Jae. **

**My dear Arìs, you are finally eighteen, a true ground breaking year. You've bloomed into a darling young woman. When you came into my life, the beginning of a new chapter was being written in the story of my existence. I dearly hope you've taken care of Jae, despite the troubles of the past. I knew that she would always look up to you, look to you for guidance while I am away. You mean so much to her, Arìs. I always knew that great things would come from you; you're so smart and intrigued about the world around you, you've always been since you were a toddler. (As dangerous as it can be sometimes.) Your mother would have been so proud to see you. You've always looked just like her, you've inherited her spirit and fire, the very thing that I loved about her. You're so very talented. When I saw your eyes grow alight at the gizmo's inside your tinker toys – why I knew, as dangerous as it is, that you would become an amazing craftsman. My, you are a true Paladin; honor the light with your grace and charisma. But personally – give 'em hell! **

**And to my lovely nymph child, Jae. Still a growing young girl, happy fifteenth birthday. Honey, you're so bright and charming. I truly hope your older sister has taken care of you since I left for the war. And to that, also, I apologize. As you will come to discover, war tears existence apart... But I'll leave that for another time. I can't imagine what you've gone through in your life, and again, I apologize. Aside from that, I knew that you would be raised well in the hands of the Horde with your sister. You belonged with your mother's people, they seemed... to be more excepting. I dearly hope that you have held your sisters hand in dark and uncertain times. I hardly know anything about you... and to that I am disheartened. I have heard, however, that you have taken up the darker arts of magic. I'm sure you're merely curious.. But careful, a warlock is borderline necromancer. And to that, I warn you. Someday I hope to meet you, to hug and kiss you, and maybe weep with you in my arms. **

**I think of you both every day of my life, when I face the reckless scourge demons with hellfire and chaos. My demon Chiinom keeps my company, when you both, or your mother cannot. She guides me every day – your mother. And to that, I am thankful.**

**With honest and sincere love,**

**Your father, Nicholas.**

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Southshore and the foothills of Hillsbrad had seen gloomier days, brighter of days. The sky held dark ominous clouds; a sky that glistened light on the evergreen pines during the summer, dropped snow onto the noses of the children as they played, and on days such as this – brightened the world though wails of agony echoed in the distance. Thoughts that loomed in the minds of two beings, breaking their hearts but opening the door to a new era in their existence. Acceptance and grief. But be fair warned, grief erodes the soul – destroying the two most important cores of a person. The heart and mind. Grief brings too many painful memories... Too much, too much... Don't fall to it... as tempting as her emptiness can bring.

But eyes were also awakened. When a door closes, another opens. Another chance... It's a hard thing to get over, nonetheless.

No, Hillsbrad had certainly seen far more horrible days, brighter days in it's time of existence since the dawn of creation. It had seen bloodshed, famine, plague and drought, and last but not least, murder. From the burning of the man of wood at Hallows Eve and the first cool day of fall, to the blooming of the orchards, their sweet scents and nectars that were sold worldwide around Azeroth. It was a land of beauty and grace, as well as treachery and misery. But no, don't let that take you down... Right?

One could say that the Undead, whether the Forsaken of Tarren Mill or beings of the Scourge, had been the cause of such... mishaps in the serene perfection of Hillsbrad. Despite the destruction that indeed the Scourge had brought, the Forsaken seemed to bring a contrast to the land. The small town proved to the many, to everyone, that nothing cannot have balance. A candle cannot light a dark path without the shadows following quietly along. Of course, despite these ideas, the truth of the matter is, the Undead did not cause such tragedies.

No, it was simply just the way things were. Again, a balance was obviously present. How humans could not understand this, I did not know. But there were several, several things that I do know. That people change over time; no one stays the same – nothing, nothing stays the same. People grow older, wiser... No, what a farce. Only some do. But how? How can some humans age, while others...well to say simply, fall behind. This was a known fact. People change when their environment changes. We adapt to the conditions, the circumstances when they arise. When we are faced with a problem, we fight it head on... or some of us, rather, become cowards. Challenges shape who we become. I can clearly state this as a fact. For I've faced many challenges, many trials over the ages. And for that, I have matured.

Quite simply, this land meant everything to me, and everything... to her. Why, so many things are tied up to the land. Gosh, it's truly the only thing that will never abandon you. Land – why, it's your home! The place where you can always find comfort, sanctuary, even in the darkest of times. Why, land is something worth fighting for. It can never leave you; it may dry and whither, but someday it will come back. Blood may spill, but the clay will be cleansed each time it rains. Whether it is something you prize or not, land is apart of us all, and therefore should be respected. It provides us with life – the very things we need to live! Why, what would the world be without a glorious landscape to gaze upon! Why, it would be nothing. Mere dust.

But to everything we had... Everything we _could_ have had. If only I had known sooner, that things would end like this. I would have been such a better, more empathetic person, gosh... if I had been, things would have been entirely different. But that's life. You can't change the past, you can't change the world of yesterday, for it's already etched in stone. But what if... _what if_ I could?

No, fate tends to twist and turn in countlessly unimaginable ways. Ways, that I never saw coming – No. Ways that neither of us saw coming.

As much as I despised her thirst for mana, the sole energy source of her race, her sarcasm and hypocrisy, somehow.. somehow we fell in love. Our love was mad, uncontrollable and somehow it twisted my heart to pieces when … No. Hillsbrad was more a land of elegance and nature's sheer beauty, that mankind had contorted with progress and destruction. It was a battlefield waiting to be ignited with passion and death. No one saw it coming. Why? No one really knows. It simply just happened.

If only we knew...


	2. The Fifth of November

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Warcraft, or any of the places or NPCs named and used._**

**_ I own my original characters and plot._**

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**Chapter One**

It was a bland day in Southshore. Drink some ale, wink at a few women in the tavern who happened to be passing by and watch as they walk off, just to see their tiny hips sway and imagine what hid beneath the gown (well, I always turned my eye away at the innkeeper's wife – she'll hit you with the butt of butcher knife if she caught you looking at the other young women). Maybe gamble here and there. It's the best way to earn quick cash, though it does ignite some pretty bloody fights... Again, don't anger the innkeeper's wife... She knows a few things about hand to hand combat (all the men who live in Southshore know of her vigilant eye and fist!). Ooh, nothing new – the usual routine. The night life of a quiet trading town was simply just that. Quiet.

Why, we, the folks of Southshore... we aren't simple minded, naïve or easily swayed. We've seen our fair share of things, especially those that have been in the army. Folks like us have to be so aware. You see, there are others in this land, up North near the mountains. The Forsaken. Bah! Savages who wreak of decaying flesh and hungry flies. Beings of the Scourge practically! But God – how they smell! ...One has to know what's going on, in case they decide to get rid of us all while we're sleeping on our bellies. Oh well. It's better to be safe than sorry, as anyone in this town would tell you.

But no, me. I've fought against them all. Each and every kind of their faction. From the cows to the fiendish Orcs. They're all the same. Barbaric and ritual, bathing in the blood of their enemies to please their spirits, sacrificing animals to their gods – pagans! Well, that's what every new recruit believes. It's an entirely different story out in the field. But I really don't care much for them, other than their bounties. That's all that's important to me. Gold's the only way you can buy ale these days. And I even know the innkeeper, Samuel Anderson and his brother as a friends, but still no luck. It must be his wife... I've called her quite a few names while drunk – my personal favorite is "Salty Old Sea Hag" for her father's side of the family comes from pirate, scalawag descent... and she always smells like sea salt after bringing in the daily sea harvest from the local fishermen.

I'm just that kind of person. Not really the honorable type. Not really a "Knight in shining armor" like most women think, just because at one time I served in the king's military and have the title "Knight Nicholas". Haven't lived in an actual city since I was sixteen, haven't slept alone since I was seventeen and I haven't lost a game of poker for about a month or so; I guess I'm bound to lose one, one of these ole' days. I guess you could say I've made my home in Southshore. If you asked where I lived, I'd shrug and grin at you, then say "Usually in Southshore, but sometimes I'm bound and gaged, dragged off to Stormwind, and forced to do some silly thing for the Alliance. Or of course, they find me here and force me to do their dirty, unheard of jobs here. But other than that, why, I live here in this lovely town."

Ah, so November. The fifth of November. The clock stroke twelve midnight, as I leaned against the counter of the quiet town's inn. Barkeep Kelly Anderson, the innkeeper's young brother, was wiping the recently washed glasses dry, while Samuel was showing some new guests to their rooms. One in particular caught my eye; a couple. A Night Elf with flowing emerald hair and glowing eyes was being whisked away by her lover, another elf with a similar hair and eye color. I grinned. Surely it would be the night of her life – just that look in his eyes. Ravenous, nearly primal; he was probably a druid. Hah! No... other than that, it was a calm evening; they usually were, unless you were playing a few hands of Poker or you were with a lady. Then things became much, much more interesting. Neema Anderson, the "Salty Old Sea Hag", was helping her own brother Chef Jesson, who made a mean Turtle Stew, in the kitchen. Neema never cooked thank God, who knows what kind of poison she would secretly put in my drink or food. I wouldn't blame her. I'd do the same, but either way, it simply just made me laugh. No... they were all family deep down. This inn had been inherited over the ages through the Anderson family. Quite a legacy, I'd say. Portraits of past innkeepers and their families hung on the walls, as well as landscapes of various lands in Azeroth, as well as a single painting of Nagrand in the Outlands. Least I thought it was Nagrand. I'd only traveled there once throughout my life time, and that was to sharpen my combat skills, despite my primary skill in magic. The Ring of Trials had seen some of the best fighters in all of Outlands, and what better than to learn from the best?

On this fine evening in November, I was expecting someone to arrive after the stroke of midnight. So far, no one had arrived. I guess it was supposed to be some official from Stormwind, as usual. Some new job, some member of the Horde or Alliance they wanted me to hunt down. Who'd it be this time? I was curious. Probably a Horde member. Most cases about a rebellious member of the Alliance were kept confidential. You wouldn't want that kind of information running around? Murders? Kidnappers? Oh they happened too often. But rarely was a civilian aware of it. Footsteps echoed in the air of the silent tavern. Kelly glanced up, as I could see from the corner of my eye, only to return his attention back to closing up for the evening. Samuel and Neema had to have gone to bed maybe an hour ago, I wasn't paying much attention to them. Kelly would be joining them soon, it wasn't his business and he had never been the nosy type.

I was more so interested in the job I would be assigned. Why did I work for the Alliance? Because I had to. And that was all I would let them have of me. I was a man of business and business alone. These jobs gave me money, which in turn granted me the things I needed to live. Ale, food, a lovely lady for the evening, and maybe fare for a trip on a ship. But not for much else. There really wasn't much to buy then, I had given up my profession a long time ago for personal reasons.

My head turned slightly to the left, to see a young man of his mid-twenties ask for a mug of beer. He looked to me and I grinned sharply. A lieutenant from Stormwind, as I figured. Blond, stern looking and serious – this man was here only on business. He knew clearly who I was, and his stiffness portrayed the idea that he wanted almost nothing to do with me. Why? Well, I was pretty close to the scum of the Earth. Meh. Lies. I just wasn't the same. I had never been a "Righteous" member of the Alliance, willing to sacrifice my life in order to prevail morality and humane living. I also didn't care much about the foreign affairs, the issues of the present day. It was merely a title, Knight. Didn't mean I was some glorious figure like Uther or Jaina Proudmoore. Jaina... mmm... Beautiful young lass. A few years older, but clearly a beauty. Well, I doubt she's very glorious with her body. She could have any man she wanted with that figure.

"Sir Knight, I bring orders from the dwarves of Ironforge and Aries Peak, Magistrate Ecrucia of this – "

"Is that so? Must be a serious crime this Hordie's committed, right? Well get on with it." I interrupted, "I'm rather drunk, I'll warn you. A few pints and I become one hell of a party, too many and I just happen to become sour. Too bad for you, I've had a slew of drinks. I don't need any of the silly background information. I'm ever so curious to know who you want me to drag to Stormwind to be executed for the bloodthirsty commanders."

The lieutenant swallowed his words, trying to be noble against my disrespect. He closed his eyes and continued, "It's an elf running around causing a ruckus, wanted for the crime of stealing crops..."

"I've seen plenty of elves around this here land. I'd love it if you were a bit more specific. Or do the crones up at Stormwind want me to slay ever elf I come in sight with? Either way, sounds exciting."

"Are you always this sarcastic?"

"Ah, no. It's usually the ale, or I simply might just be a jerk in general. I really don't know. But you don't want to know about that, do you? Come on, get on with it. I have a life too, yer know. And I'm sure you would love to get this over with."

The lieutenant was contemplating his actions, restraining his swelling anger. I had never been a kind person to any of the officials in the military. Why bother? They couldn't demote me. Not because of a few "harmless words" or insults, as the common man liked to call it.

"A Blood Elf has been causing trouble throughout this region and the southern Hinterlands. No deaths, so far, but this elf has been tampering with trading shipments as well as stealing from storage supplies from this town and Aries Peak. She tends to... –"

"Wait, hold on. She?" My attention was poked at. I loved having assignments to go after a woman. Allowed me to toy with them until we reached the destination. Though, I only messed with elves and trolls. At least they were something decent to look at. Otherwise, I'd just be an ass the entire way. It really softens 'em up for imprisonment, as they finally get away from me. That always put a wicked grin on my face, especially when I receive the bank notice. That's always fun. "So she's a thief eh?"

"Not... exactly. She's slain messengers and scouts in these areas, gathering information as well as stealing crucial documents from towns and trading outposts. Some highly classified papers; I'm guessing they're from the Argent Dawn, about the war front against the Scarlet Crusade and feedback from out spies in Undercity."

"How the hell can you have a spy in the Undercity. It's the undead capital. How do you manage to disguise a human for that long? You'd have to kill them under the scourge's..." And then reality smacked me in the face. I wasn't surprised. Filthy humans and their lust for enemy secrets, the desire to know, well the unknown. "So was it a convict or an innocent civilian?"

"How dare you... assume such things! Why the Alliance would never..." But the lieutenant was merely defensive because of Barkeep Kelly's presence. His eyes gave it away; they were jumpy and unsure, caught in the act read handed. His dark brown pupils were glancing shiftily, nervously at Kelly as he ascended up the stairway to his quarters. The lieutenant sighed, running a hand through his dirty blond hair, nearly pulling at it.

I took another large gulp of my glass and leaned forward, nearly laughing. "All is fair in love and war, hm? I'm surprised I didn't even hear of this plan. Well, I guess I shouldn't be. Knowing myself, it would have slipped while intoxicated. Now... we wouldn't want that kind of news breaking out?"

"It... was a group of alchemists who were supposed to watch over the change, actually." Greedily, the man took a large gulp of ale, as if to somehow forget the memories that floated back into his head. "A rogue snuck into their city awhile back, through the sewers and into the Apothecarium. They stole a sample of the vile concoction they had been making. You know... the plague one, the one that Apothecary Putriss had been assigned to during the Scourge invasions from about a month ago. They've died down, as you know."

He hesitated before continuing, as if some deep grief on his behalf was finally being unraveled. "The rogue eventually came back. But due to a mishap in handling, the essence nearly consumed them. Three of them didn't make it. They became mindless zombies and threatened to spread the disease to other civilians of Stormwind. So, one paladin was... erm, forced to..." He couldn't say it. This man must have witnessed it, or in fact performed the bloody exorcism. He was after all a paladin. "...the others became Undead of say Tarren Mill and Undercity. Decayed and withered. The two remaining retained their memories, and have been stationed as alchemists in the Apothecarium. Our transits from them usually come in vials with a special chemical.. I can't explain it. So... back to the Elf. Well, she's captured one of these transits en route to Menethil Harbor where it would be on a ship to Stormwind.

"Simply, you have to find her before she reaches Undercity. She was last spotted in the Hinterlands, where the secret transit was "supposed" to be making a stop for Aries Peak. She's intercepted it, and probably either heading to Undercity itself, or to Revantusk Village. We received word of this about a week ago, via Gryphon messengers."

"So how much gold will I be given?"

"Does it matter? We're going to be exposed! A war could break out!"

"I don't do a job unless it involves money in the end." And I was stiff about that. I never did anything without some kind of reward, otherwise, it was a waste of time. Heh. I was probably the best there was; things like this always came my way. The only thing I was honorable enough of doing for the Alliance was fulfilling their jobs. I knew the tricks of the trade. I was nearly as skilled as any rogue at thievery, bribery and tracking (well, only if the being tracked needed mana to survive; my Fel Hunter did all the tracking, gluttonous thing). Plus I was in the area.

"You know Stormwind isn't interested in a war... They're just..."

"Trying to play safe, by finding out things about the enemy? I'd be damned if the Alliance ever tried maybe, oh...I don't know peace offerings? Selfish bastards." I snarled, chuckling grimly.

"... and they're loaded on gold. The cities trade has been flourishing – they'll give you whatever you want. I'll see to it."

Was I about to trust the word of some measly human, who claimed to be a lieutenant, but rather, acted like a fresh new recruit? I guess. They seemed pretty desperate. But then I grinned. There were ways of keeping people's word. I snapped my fingers, calling for my succubus, Hesriel. The darling, she always seemed to help "persuade" people who were causing me trouble, or to convince those who opposed me. In left hand was her long, serrated whip, and in the other a piece of parchment, a demonic contract.

Graciously I took it from her delicate claws, my other hand reaching up and softly caressing her cheek. The same sinisterly seductive smile appeared on her face as she walked off, swaying her hips even more exaggeratively, just to catch my eye. She disappeared into the shadows, likely heading to my bedroom in the inn. I licked my lips as I took another swig of ale. Turning to the lieutenant, I began, "Now, this is simple. I quite frankly just can't trust your word. If Stormwind's desperate enough, then you have nothing to worry about here. Simply sign this document, swearing your gracious and large debt to me, and I'll be happy to comply with your job."

"And... should I not..?"

"I don't think you want to hear the consequences." I said maliciously, my pupils turning slightly red viciously piercing into him. Cautiously, the man signed his life away for the time. His fate was in my grasp, for however I pleased. He had to; there was no other choice. Many people were counting on my capturing of this Elf, which I guess was going to prevent a war. Oh well, silly humans and their petty wars. Once it was complete, I smiled, almost happily, as if to mock him. "Now that I'm interested, I'll need a description."

"Well, you know what a blood elf looks like. Brown hair, green glowing eyes, pale skin. She's a paladin. Most likely has a sword or ax as a weapon. I heard Blood Elf Paladin's have these seal things... look for that too."

"I'm guessing you don't know the name."

"No...I don't. Only a sighting."

Standing, I nodded compliantly. "Well, my dear lieutenant of our valiant faction, I'm glad to be doing business with you. Now if you excuse me, I must gather my things. Have a nice evening... Oh and, don't forget our little contract. I'd hate for something... terrible to happen because you couldn't come to your end of the bargain on time. I'll be expecting full payment. In gold. Until then." And I walked off, back up the stairs, practically leaving the man cowering in his chair. His hand was shaking violently and I'm sure he was leaving already to inform the leaders of the Alliance of my agreement to help.

My room was on the third to the right, thankfully not next to Neema and her husbands. As I had suspected, my lovely Hesriel was waiting for me... but the ale was clogging my thoughts and I was dizzy. I stood before the vanity, staring at myself in the mirror. I sighed. I was clearly flawed. My dark brown hair was pulled back, as usual, clearly allowing people to see the burn scar on my face. It covered the right side of my face, running down my neck and chest, down to my left leg. It was because of a fire in Stormwind, when I was a teenager... But I wouldn't allow the memory to come back. The burn stung, and there was no way of stopping it. Even with the intoxication of alcohol, it somehow managed to afflict me. My green eyes were tainted by a demonic presence, which I had since I was also a teenager.

Hesriel noticed my silent, unmoving frame and came behind me, wrapping her silky arms around my neck, her claws grazing my skin lightly, temptingly. "Master... what's wrong?"

"Oh, another job." I closed my eyes, wishing I could stay in her arms. But gold was gold, and I had to find that Elf before she ruined things, and arrived at her destination, which would most likely be Revantusk. Hesriel's voice and actions asked it of me, but I sadly had to deny it. I turned, and shook my head, as I began to gather my things. She sighed. Hesriel acted the most human rather than other succubus' I had seen. Despite my control of her, how I could banish her in seconds... She still clung to me like I was her own kind, and somehow I think she loved me. But I never returned things such as that. She was a demon, it was all merely business and lust. None of it was real.

"It's another woman you're going after, isn't it?"

I didn't reply, I had to get going. "Hessa, I command you to go back to the other realm. I'm done with you for now." She seemed slightly hurt, but she was a succubus. She had her moments, yet like any woman – for she sometimes became disguised as one, she could feel rejection. Next, I called for my demon, Chiinom to come from the shadows. It zealously ran from the shadows and to my feet. Glowing green drool fell from it's mouth, falling onto the floor, leaving a puddle of disgusting goo. The Fel Hunter was prime for tracking down Blood elves. Their thirst for mana was comparable to a Fel Hunter's, and Chii would scent anything that thrived on it. The creature had no eyes, rather white horns and feelers coming from the front, and sort of a chimera body that was shades of brown, red, and black. Carrying my things, and guiding the demon along, we headed for the stables in the cool night air. My Fel Steed was waiting, it's reigns sturdy leather that was resistant to fire. I pulled Dante out and into the calm night air. Quickly I saddled up, and commanded the Fel Hunter to lead the way to the Hinterlands in search of the female paladin.


	3. Deadly Dreams

_**Disclaimer**:I do not own the NPCs or Warcraft. My characters and plot are original, and therefore mine. This story is fictitious; names mentioned have no relation to people in real life._

_Rated **M** for content and language._

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**Chapter Two**

Could the night sky look any more beautiful on the calm evening? Well, seemingly calm. Tension hung in the air, curiosity hung my heart. Adrenaline rushed wildly through my veins; I had to admit, I loved going after a member of the Horde or Alliance, it's so much fun. But more importantly, I wanted to see her. Know what kind of thing I was up against. What kind of woman? – for there are several types. Obviously she wasn't some of them, no, she certainly wouldn't be innocent. She most likely had blood stained on her hands from years in the past. Who didn't these days? Plus, not everyone stole incriminating documents from the opposite faction, as fun as it could be. But the other types of women... Oh, they were the fun ones. The wild, stallion type, the ones that hated being tamed, held back. Yes, a lot of the Horde were like that, I knew. Then there were the clever, clandestine kind. Oh, those were intriguing, playing mind puzzles until someone's outwitted. Lovely. Then there were the lustful ones, the ones who just loved to be toyed with, to be poked and prodded at, literally. I licked my lips savoringly, imagining her perfect elf frame. God I loved women.

… But, then again. She could have been a normal member of her faction. Being brave for something that she believed had to be brought to her leaders attention.

Nah, of course not. Not from the way Chii was going off. Chii was leaving a trail of icky, slimy drool as he eagerly ran onward. Why so zealously? Well the answer was simple. The demon needed mana to survive, therefore, it stole it from other beings. The feelers on it's head wrapped around a body part that contained a continued flow of mana, usually the leg, then sucked away. Much like a vampire, or a leech would. The scar was a nasty one too, I knew. Taming the creature from it's gluttonous desires was one thing, but keeping it from going after the everyday civilian... Hell, that was amusing to watch, in a sadistic kind of way, I guess. I shrugged it off usually after awhile, commanding for the creature to stop in the dialect that all my demons could understand and fluently speak, except for my void walker and succubus. Chii was a pitiful creature of never being satisfied. Never being sated with what he'd been given. I knew the feeling, nonetheless. It was the reason why I wandered often, and well, I became bored quickly.

Chii led the way, nearly galloping at the swift horse's speeds. Occasionally I'd stop to let the thing catch up, or for myself to cool off by the river that ran throughout Hillsbrad. It was summer and the evenings of Hillsbrad were warm, at least until we reached the borders of the Hinterlands. I had followed the creature basically upriver, turning away before Tarren Mill, and heading into the Hinterlands. I was nearly laughing sometimes. Chii acted very much like a hungry dog, panting and begging for some kind of treat.

"Master..." it moaned in demonic and slight agony; I hadn't let it feed in awhile, so it was bound to be hungry. All the better for when it found her. I replied in demonic as well, almost hissing the words to the creature, "Work for it; are we getting closer?"

It replied that indeed, they were getting close. About another hour. She must have been by the lake, for Chii ran in it's direction. We lived here years ago, my family and I. It was a place of quiet solitude and innocent childhood. My memories on this land however, were slim to few...But sure enough, there were profound ones that would never abandon me. One being that my father had been absent the entire time, off in battle in the snowy, desolate land of Vikings and the Scourge, Northrend... But besides that... I would lay against the grass, play in the forest, splash in the water. I even had a dog, a scruffy mutt, who always had playful eyes. Child's play, basically. But after my family had been further split apart by war, my Mother and I moved to Stormwind. If I remember correctly, we left the seclusion of the forest for my older brother's burial ceremony in the glorious city. Daniel Archavon, killed in battle. He was eighteen at death, I was eight. According to my mother, the two other male figures in my family had gone to war when I was three. I didn't even know what either of them looked like, but mother had pictures. I looked more like my father than my mother. Brown hair, pale skin and green eyes. My mother had short red hair, and gentle blue eyes. Daniel looked like a combination of the two, with deep auburn hair. She always seemed happy while we were in the shelter of the mountain home. In Stormwind, however, it took a lot to make her happy for a long period of time. Then I picked up engineering,... After a series of events ending in my departure from the city, I felt so lost, so deprived of this land, and I helplessly came back three years ago. I sat on a calm hill, staring at the fluffy clouds with Hessa next to me. She listened to my sensible talk in between fondling, but she never grasped the ideas. She was only a demon, who happened to have some sort of feelings. She didn't understand longing, the kind of dreams I had had in my past. She didn't understand why I felt empty. But the times without her, I just laid back, shut my eyes and thought about how things could have been. Oh, I thought about these things often, even when I hadn't been there. I wasn't the only person out there in the world, who felt like they had been put in the wrong life.

I always wanted a wife, a child, to become a noble kind of guy who owned an engineering shop. Or maybe own an inn someplace quiet, away from all the chat about needless things. Yes.. indeed. A beautiful wife, one I could cherish and adore. Someone I could spoil with flattery and make love to like an animal all at the same time. I wanted to feel things, feel true passion behind a courtesan or succubus'

touch. She would listen to me, relate to my emotions (not taking them as a sign of weakness, but a sign that I was really human despite the demonic presence), and be able to hold me against her breast and keep me warm. We'd have kids sometime after awhile. We'd raise them 'till they were old enough, and watch them go, hoping we'd done the right thing. We'd grow old, the usual. Die together, be in heaven side by side, hand in hand. We'd sit in the clouds, watch the people we loved live their lives. Watch our children grow old, then welcome them with open arms when it came their time.

But things didn't end up like that, as you know. Things take many turns, twist in several ways. We follow a road, but we end up hitting forks unsure of where to turn. We flip a coin, and let it decide our fate. The map shows two roads, and the decision impacts your life. But there were accidents... Where things turned sour, bitter... and there would be no other choice... Things you wish you could change. But sadly, I couldn't build a machine that could erase the errors of the past. That would sheer defiance of reality.

I sighed. It was no use thinking of such things. They made me vulnerable, weak and sometimes oblivious to what was going on. After about an hour we were deep into the forests of Hinterlands, reaching the large lake near the elven hideout. I was beginning to sense the presence of holy magic in the air, as well as it's blood knight taint. I scowled, it wasn't an aura that you could just shake off when you had portions of demonic blood and organs in your body. Meh, it only made things more interesting. Paladins usually were feisty, for being so "holy", I guess. They were zealous usually, much like the Scarlet Crusade. Almost all of them were paladins, or some kind of holy being. They thought they knew it all, scornful humans. I sighed, oh well. I couldn't change those kinds of facts. Finally Chii slowed to a walk and I dismounted, ordering for Dante to stay a ways back. I had to be sneaky; I did not want to be found while I was unprepared. Silently I walked through the trees, still letting the Fel Hunter lead. In the distance, I saw the mists of the waterfall as well as hear the rush of moving water. My heart pounded in my ears, which took me off-guard... such a thing had never occurred before... It was as if it knew something...

And then I saw her. Her figure arched to the cascading water that fell against her frame. I crept through the bushes trying very earnestly not to make any sound, hoping to get a better view. I stared, struck back blindly by it. Hell, I was probably drooling along with the damn demon now. The moonlight made her skin glow in sheer luminescent beauty, the stray droplets of water dared my eyesight – I was suddenly in a trance. Emerald green eyes sparkled elegantly, light lashes closing them when she let the water fall upon her face. Thick, lusciously wet brown hair hung down to the bottom of her back, sticking some to her skin. Her breasts were taut, peaked in the cold water, gently rounded and full. Legs built for combat, but silky enough for dancing or for merely showing off, held her up. But the seals caught my eye. Designs or words in Thalassian swirled around her skin, much like tattoos. They glowed dimly, allowing me to finally notice the various amount of scars and bruises. Yes, this was the paladin. The seals and location confirmed it. I grimaced; I couldn't keep my eyes off her, she was like a siren luring me in, not with words but with a visual too ethereal to dismiss. I had never seen anything like her – no creature (which included demons) had done this to me. I was shaken nearly to my Frostweave boots, nearly jumping out of the bushes, paralyzing her body with Fel Magick, then having my way with her. Time seemed to stop, pause in the wake of life itself. I just gazed deep into her eyes, retracing my way down and up her body. God, couldn't she sense it! Couldn't she sense the presence!? Couldn't she feel that eyes were gazing hungrily at her, so very eager to devour her mere existence in desire? I shrugged, probably not. She seemed relaxed, as time sped up again in my eyes.

I resisted the temptation, peeling my eyes away from her, leaning against a nearby tree's trunk. I breathed deeply, blinking a few times. _Get a hold of yourself you lustful fool, _I commanded. _She's your ticket to money, which means ale, women! Anything you desire._

But the idea didn't seem to register. Money... ale? I couldn't even remember what those things were. I was frozen in the sudden idea of twisting her life force into my control... But my heart sank involuntarily, it wouldn't be the same. _Damnit, get ahold of yourself! You gave up that dream a long time ago._ I yelled as reality switched itself back on. I reminded myself one more time of my goals, and not thinking of anything else but that as I staked her campsite out until she was asleep. It was probably the ale anyways. _Nothing looks like that. Nothing looks as beautiful as her. _Yes, just the ale... Why did it always have to be the damn ale?!

She took her time bathing, as if she knew there was an audience who was lurching in their loins and heart. I had to control myself. I'll just take her down when she doesn't expect it... Yes, Chii. Chii. The demon, of course! Chii made my life one hundred times easier then. Weaken her first, then go in for the capture. I looked again over in her direction. Laying against the grass, staring at the starry sky. For a single moment I thought of my childhood, how I used to do the exact same thing. A glimpse of a future shot in my mind. A clear, calm night... the wind churning lightly through the trees, my arms wrapped around an hourglass frame, whispering words of endearment – Then I shook my head, blasphemy! My senses were getting the better of me. My mind was losing it. What was going on? This had never happened! Why, why now? I had captured plenty of other women... Why her? I shut my eyes, taking a deep breath, almost gasping for air. Soon enough, I noticed that she was asleep, curled under a blanket with her own stallion drinking from the lake, only to lie down next to her seconds after. A wispy fire crackled a foot away from her, creating a gentle ring of light in the darkness of the forest. To her left, was a stack of plate mail armor and a large sword that gleamed ruby red in the faint firelight.

The shadows played calmly on her face, as Chii and I walked into the campsite. From only a few feet away, she looked innocent enough. Her eyes were lightly shut, most likely dreaming of whatever it was she wondered about. I watched her for a moment, silently, letting the emotions contort in my stomach. Soon enough, she began to murmur things breathlessly under her breath. I heard I weak moan – was she having a nightmare? No... her lips curled into a smile, making me grin. Tsk, tsk, tsk, the ever so holy Paladin was having a wet dream. I nearly laughed. I didn't blame her. The elf was also around my age, young and lovely in appearance. It was natural to think of such things. But before I did anything, I quickly questioned myself, making sure I was doing the right thing. _Damn conscience, always getting in the way._ Again, I hesitated before commanding the demon to begin draining mana. It took a moment for the woman to wake up, finally realizing that she wasn't alone. She tried to move, but was simply frozen.

"Evening, deary. My, my, I'm terribly sorry to end your lovely dream, but I had to. You see, you're such a pretty thing... And I couldn't just let you have all the fun." Her eyes darted me, following the direction of my voice. She blinked, almost surprised that I knew Orcish. One had to learn it while training as a warlock. The dark arts knew no faction while training... but out on the battlefield... But for a moment she stared, puzzled by my clear Orcish, but also... as if she recognized me. I ignored it and continued. "You really should have known us Alliance would hear about them documents. Not much slides under our watchful eyes." She seemed blindly confused, and she was unable to reply. Throughout the process of suckling mana, the victim would slowly regain the ability to move, but only sluggishly. The process wasn't meant to kill, but rather to significantly weaken. "Now, we can do this the easy way... or the hard way... I enjoy the hard way..." I bent over some, whispering the words, "Come now, let's make that dream of your come alive..."

Once the effect began to wear off, I let her stagger up and lazily claw for her sword. "You.. bastard. Cheap shot," She groaned, rubbing her head, "attacking me while I was asleep..."

"All's fair in love and war, darling." I had to weaken her further, so I tossed a spell that would inject shadow magic into her veins, which usually was painful to begin with. She stumbled when the magic began to seep in, but her sword arm was somehow able to swing forcefully towards me. I easily dodged, able to outrun her sluggish movements. Her horse was awake now, charging towards me when I was caught off guard. Quickly I turned, my palm turned outward as I muttered an enchantment that would cause the creature to cripple until it was passed out. In a matter of seconds, it collapsed to the ground, fainted.

During this time, the Paladin was able to get closer to me, allowing her to take an easy shot my arm. Her blade sliced through my sleeve, cutting my shoulder some. I grimaced, cursing under my breath. Chii was prancing around trying to regain contact with her mana nodes on her other leg. Being a Paladin, she was able to ward off the demon, causing it to mindlessly run into things without control over itself. Slowly she regained some strength after leaning against a tree trunk, only to be hit by one of my shadowbolts, knocking her back completely against the tree. Before she could squirm off, I pinned her back with a spell that drained a lot of my own energy, but allowed me to gain control of my opponent for awhile. "Now... stay still. You've already caused enough trouble. Must I make things worse?"

"I'd rather die by your hand then in the scum of the militia in Stormwind, human. At least I will have died honorably, in hopes of delivering crucial documents to Sylvannas. Come now, finish me." Her words dared me to, but I had a job to complete.

"But why on Earth should I? It's much more fun to drag you around, all the way to Stormwind, then have them tear you apart in the Stockades... Darling, you don't want to die by my hand. Why?" I grinned wickedly, my eyes turning bright, bloody red, "Because I make it a living hell, where your nightmares come alive. I would love to watch you suffer eternally, in a hell that even your light cannot purge." I walked up to her, my hand cupping her chin slowly leaning in, "All it takes... is a little gesture, a touch of sheer wicked pleasure..." my lips hovered over her own, my breath cool and tempting as I continued, "... and then eternal agony..."

She squirmed helplessly in her gaze, even she was afraid of such a horrid death. I laughed maliciously, running a hand through my hair. I pulled the elf forward my lips crashing onto hers, ordering her body to respond to my command. A significant jolt surged through my veins, and I could see her flinch at it as well. She struggled in my grasp, but I bit roughly at her tongue, only to pull away laughing wildly. The elf seemed to growl, her eyes pierced daggers into me, and my heart seemed to lurch. My emotions sunk in, I nearly lost control, if I had sent Fel magic into her lips... She would have been a goner in seconds. I breathed in deeply and tossed her frame aside. I scowled, she was most likely oblivious to my entire interior that was panicking at how things should turn out. Growling at my own thoughts, I muttered a Curse of Exhaustion under my breath. She leaned against a tree, as the Curse drained her energy further. I heard her curse in Thalassian, as well as hear her groan in pain.

"Giving up, yet?" I asked. She glared as she stuttered only a few sounds, "I..." And then her eyes, against her will, closed, her head falling limp against the thick trunk.

I sighed. That had taken much longer than I had imagined. Quickly I walked over to her exhausted and drained body. Chii had sucked her vital energy source nearly dry, as was necessary. I shook my head; thinking about it would only make things more difficult. I rubbed my forehead wanting nothing more than the ability to let this _not_ affect my decisions. Closing my eyes, I pictured the laughable relief in the messengers eyes as I brought the elf to Stormwind, the burden lifting off his shoulders, then the gold placed into my hands... but then, I would look up and see the glowing green eyes staring at me, piercing into me.

I blinked. _Stop it. Get over it, you're stronger than this._

_

* * *

  
_

The evening waned on as I traveled quietly with Dante, who's strides were light and careless. We weren't in a rush, not at night at least. The elf's horse followed, controlled by my own bond, as the being seemed to emit a demonic presence that I as a warlock could control. It's lustrous yellow-green eyes were defensive, wild and untamed as it mentally struggled with me to regain freedom. It surprised me really, when I felt the aura about the creature. Why would a Paladin of such "holiness" have a demon as a companion? Then again... Blood Elf Paladins, Blood Knights, as they preferred to be called, were not entirely in tune with the Light. I guess I really did not know. Then again, I guess I would have to find out. There were a lot of things I did not understand beyond my own training and experience, I guessed I that I would find out sooner or later.

* * *

I set up camp in the foothills of the Hinterlands, leading into the snowy cascades of the land. I built a small fire in a clearing of the forest where the ground was lightly covered in snow. I was pleased that the weather was peaceful; snow in these lands was not only dangerous due to the temperatures and unpredictable climate, but it was easy to become lost in the snow flurries. I leaned against a tall, think trunk of a tree staring at the clear night sky. Across the fire was Chii laying lazily on the ground next to the elf, who was still passed out. It had, afterall, been three days since her capture. I wasn't surprised that she was still out. Most of my victims, the term I could only think of that would fit, were out for a week or so, which was never a problem. Not only did it make things quiet and calm, I could think clearly. Daze off...

In my dream, I was in Hillsbrad in the faint moonlight of the forest. The wind rustles through my hair as I calmly breathed in the fresh summer air. I smile, and feel entirely at peace. This was quite peculiar. I had not felt such tranquility since well, the time when my mother was still alive. But this.. this was a different kind of feeling. Warmth echoes throughout my core as a delicate hand clasps my own, and I turn and look. Standing whimsically is the Elf in nothing but a sheer, thin Runecloth gown. But by God, she stood there... returning my gaze and laughing. She batts her eyes playfully and her fingers trail down my neck, over the burn scars. I relish in the sensation; she moves lower, over my chest. Her eyes are daring, wicked and tempting. Eagerly I take her frame into me, my lips crashing down upon her tiny lips. She arcs to me, nibbles at my own lips until we part, our tongues playing cat and mouse. She holds back a moan as I move away, down her neck, as her fingers become tangled in my neck. In seconds I'm sliding the gown off her flesh, pinching her skin as I go. First, the straps... slowly, lazily. She heaves, her chest rising sharply against my own. I grin, moving my lips over her collarbone, pulling with my teeth the simple strap. Again, she tries, but a soft moan erupts from her throat. Once the straps are lowered, I teasingly brush her left mound lightly, nipping the tip, over the cloth as she struggles effortlessly to get me to continue forward. I chuckle and whisper mischievous words in her ear as she giggles in reply.

I continue to torture her, leaving the gown bunched up at her waist. I stare at her full breasts, taut and eager for me. I take my time, thumbing each, one at a time. She bites her lip, arching her back again to me. In a silent plea, she kisses my scars down my cheek. I capture her mouth again, roughly and fiercely now. She pulls away, panting seconds later, her fingers touching her lips noticing that they're swollen. I wink, and she laughs carelessly. My kisses trail down her neck again, her glowing seals pulsating rapidly as I move over them. My own marks are left, down until I reach her chest. I look up only to catch her looking back. I ask her again and she nearly screams her reply to me, making my eager smirk wider. Gently I take the left into my mouth, pulling back slowly as she whines for more. Patience, patience. The tempo soon increases, as I ravage her chest, savoring her feminine adrenaline and sensuality. She moans my name, making my blood pound faster through my veins, I can hardly believe this is happening. I lower her to the grass, laying her gently before me. Her dress is long gone, nearly ripped off her body earlier. She helps me with my own tunic, unbuttoning it, only to soon frown. She sits up, her fingers grazing the burn scars that plagued my body. I lay my head in her breast, blowing on them lightly as I situate her into my lap. Her legs are straddled around me, her lips on my neck. She explores my torso, memorizing each scar and mark on my skin. A pale hand rests over my chest, as she feels the jolt of demonic energy that courses through my veins. I whisper again for permission, and she willingly nods.

Again, the Elf helps me with my Netherweave cloth pants, sliding them off my skin, tossing them into the pile of clothes. She stares at me, eyes widening. Her pulse is pounding, her seals show it, and her breathing is hitched. I reassuringly kiss her lips, easing her into it. I delicately lay her against the cool earth, the tip against her thigh as I settle over her, so that my weight is on my arms. I tell her to close her eyes, to not be afraid, and she wearily smiles. I enter her, barely, making sure that I do not hurt her. She trembles some, and I watch her closely. She breathes deeply and nods. I slid in further; one false move could end it all... But soon enough, she discovers the pleasure in the matter, and learns the tempo. She returns my thrusts, screaming now. We continue until she grows tired, until she climaxes, and screams my name fully and proudly. I slide off of her, and kiss her heaving chest, taking her into my arms. My lips move to her ear and I tell her that I love her. That I love her and only her. My Elirina.

But soon enough, the dream ends as soon as it began.

I opened my eyes, jolting from my sleep. I was panting and covered in sweat. I sat up further, rubbing my forehead and eyes. _What in the hell just happened? _I screamed in my head. I close my eyes, staring up at the sky. We had made love, that Elf and I. Her first time, the first time I ever uttered the words "love" and "you" and actually seemed to mean it. I remembered every shutter, every moan that she made. And then her name. I knew it now, but I couldn't let her realize it. _Fucking Ale, messing with my thoughts and emotions._

She was awake, her emerald orbs staring at me not angrily but in a haze. Obviously her memory was betraying her. At first, she looked innocent enough. Calm, not frightened but helpless-ish. I wondered what she was thinking about, until I grinned. She mumbled something, blinked twice and the wave of what had happened in recent days overcame her. She snarled a curse in Thalassian and glared.

"Good evening, dearest Elf." I spoke, nearly charming. My voice was velvet, sensual, as I had had a few drinks along the way. I always had a few bottles of Vin with me, never know when you might need it. I craned my neck, taking pleasure in seeing her struggle helplessly under my bond. The Elf wasn't able to move while under the spell, thankfully too, she had a violent essence about her.

"So, now that you're awake. Time to talk. Who are you?" I asked lazily. She could at the very least honor me with a name.

"Does it matter? I'll just be a blood stain on the ground in a few weeks."

I smirked. Feisty, just as I enjoyed. "Ah, but I'm sure you have a lovely name. I'd hate to have to call you 'elf' the entire time, it's just so... unfitting."

"Get over yourself. You may have me under some spell, but that doesn't mean I have to look at you." On cue, she closed her eyes and sighed.

"And neither do I, but I simply don't get the choice." She really didn't realize that I had, after all, captured her and could simply end her life on the second. I guess not. I didn't want to. Why? Easy to explain; I wanted to toy with her. She seemed like the type to easily be swayed, beyond the rough exterior. I ignored the visions of my dream that lingered in my mind. "Come now, don't be so cruel! We're stuck with each other whether you like it or not. I'd suggest you keep me entertained... or I might get bored, and I do something..." Before I finished my phrase, I tilted my finger sending waves of Fel Magick to her body. Fel Magick, was painful to any mortal who was apart of the "light", as they called it. Priests and Paladins, in general, were immune to shadow magick, but Fel Magick, on the other hand, was granted upon warlocks who were exceptionally gifted with the darker arts. I being one of them, was a fan of the magick, and with that said, I used it most often on such "defenders" of the light. With the curse singing over her flesh, she groaned and grimaced, bearing the agony until she began to whimper. I didn't look at her as I did it, I couldn't, but I continued my phrase, "... carelessly, sweetie. I'd _hate_ to do that."

Beneath the light Netherweave blanket, I noticed one of her seals was glowing a bright blue, pulsating quickly. It reminded me of a vein and it made me wonder about the others, and what their purpose was. Obviously it wasn't for decoration, but nonetheless, it was an added touch. I stood up and walked over to her, kneeling before her, releasing her of the spell. I lifted her by the hair and stared as she flung around wildly. I couldn't let her know that I was panicking inside.

"Come on, tell me. I'm _dying_, to know. If that makes it any better."

Feeling that there was no choice, she closed her eyes and softly uttered her name, "Elirina."

The world shifted as the dream flushed back into my mind yet again, and I could only drop her to the ground and move away, rubbing my forehead vigorously. I conjured magical cuffs that would hold her within 5 feet of me, allowing her to at least move around some. I couldn't look at her though. Just the image tore me up. _Damnit! How in hell am I supposed to deal with this! _I did not know, but I had to learn sometime before things became... difficult. But then I remember the expression she gave me when I woke her up on the night of her capture. Her dream, the way she stared at me...


	4. The OhSoValiant Monster

_**Plot **__and __**Characters**__ are mine, Blizzard owns Warcraft, k._

Some Vulgarity.

* * *

**Chapter 3**

I didn't sleep well for the next few nights. It wasn't because of the dream's recurrence. No, it wasn't that. Of course, my subconscious continued to play dirty tricks on me, taunting myself to become angry and confused. Rather, I had these vision things, where a lady of sheer light would speak to me, tell me some crazy prophecy, and then disappear into nothingness. Odd? I guess. Ale did wild things to you, if you weren't paying attention. I usually wasn't drunk, but of course, I was running low by the end of the first week. I needed something to keep me from lashing out. We had made it to Southshore, at the very least, thanks to my stern persistence. I was humble enough to let the Paladin ride Dante. I really wasn't interested in hearing her bitch about how tired she was, and she often was exhausted, thanks to Chii's thirst for mana. Hearing her go on and on about this or that! And I had thought that gnomes were petulancies!

She was extremely irritating. The Elf did whatever she could to piss me off and sometimes she was successful. She whined about this or that, that it was too hot, or too cold, or that her back hurt from sitting on the horse for so damned long. We both knew that she was perfectly fine, but she continued. At night I drained her of her mana by letting Chii suckle her leg while I rested. Dante and I did all the walking, and even the demonic horse grew tired. But Chii was pestering as well if he didn't get his daily treat (the elf). I had also noticed that the Elf had grown thiner over the past week, since she refused to eat. She always went on about glory and how she would rather die of starvation, yadda, yadda, yadda. Fine. Whatever. But I always fished at night, as I always chose to camp out next to a lake or a river, and enjoyed fresh meat while I heard her stomach growl. Occasionally from the corner of my eye, I'd catch her licking the remnants from the bones, but I tossed them out of her hands. She didn't want my offerings, then she didn't get my scraps. Simple as that. Then she complained about not getting any privacy while bathing. God, what a nuisance; but this always did trip me up. She knew that I was attracted to her and I guess I was. She was pretty, slim, curvaceous. And I did watch her while leaning against a tree usually. Sure, why not? At first she was humiliated, but after day three, she got over it and began to torture me some. She'd bathe in full view and rub her skin with the few herbs that she had stolen from my backpack. Fine, so be it. I could handle that. Least... I told myself that over and over. Whatever, it's not like I was going to let her win. I forced her to watch as well, when I chose to bathe. This of course, was amusing. She'd blush and try to look away, but I'd walk over to her and pull her face back and intentionally, would I brush my body against her. This would flare her up with several emotions; the usual five: Anger, Embarrassment, hidden Delight, Lust, and Curiosity.

She wanted to play a game, and I knew enough about gambling to know a few tricks myself.

I guess you could say I received some honor while in Southshore. The townspeople were pleased of my sudden success. The Elf held her head high and scowled at the meaningless insults the people tossed towards her. She didn't care, they didn't know her. It was useless to try and weaken the Paladin, unless it was about sex or her personal life. She hated it when I asked her things while we were in Southshore, in my usual room in the inn. She would lay on the ground and myself on the bed during the night. I basically prevented her from getting any sleep while we made our stay. In two days, a boat would arrive from Menethil, where we would take another boat to Stormwind, with only a single stop at Ratchet for supply shipments.

On the first evening of our stay, I was resting on top of the mattress, with my eyes closed. She was angrily glaring at the wall, huddled together.

"So you've never been with another member of the Horde, hm?" I began, almost casually.

"I refuse to reply to anything you ask." She sighed, rubbing her arms, " It's not like you care."

But the phrase, _It's not like you care_, implied that she wanted me to continue to ask her until she snapped. Or at least, that was how I interpreted it. She would avoid my questions, or fold her arms and raise her head in defiance. I was just curious and I intended to at least find out somethings about her.

"So I'm guessing that because you continue to avoid my questions, by acting all high and mighty, I'm assuming that you have indeed, never been with a man. Interesting."

"Assume what you like, I don't care."

"And by all means, I will assume. You see, I'm bored, and not interested in getting buzzed up on alcohol. Though, I guess I could summon my succubus and have her teach you how to be a bit more seductive."

This caught her off guard, she raised an eyebrow and was lightly blushing. She seemed to want nothing more than to chop my jaw off so that I couldn't talk. She hated me, quite frankly. Fine, I didn't mind. A lot of people hated me, this wasn't new.

"So there's no one on the Horde side who's going to miss you?"

"You jerk, of course there will be people who lament my death. But it won't be in vain. At least I'll have died –

"With honor, I heard you for the 300th time, thanks. But no man will seek revenge for your honorable death?"

She laughed and gave me a, _Real Amusing_, look. I laughed and grinned. "Then I guess it's about time I asked you about that dream you had when I captured you. Since you've never been with a man, I'm assuming it's the man you've always, no pun intended, dreamt of?"

Rolling her eyes, she tried to ignore me – I had hit a weak spot in her armor. I was curious, even about my own dream. I wanted to know more about it, and if hers was similar. Clearly it could have been, because of her reaction when she saw me. I knew that feeling. That, _what in the hell just happened_, kind of feeling. It was probably just some stupid thing caused by the ale on my behalf; I had no idea what was her reason. But it made me think more deep, one could say, into it. This usually ended up in my emotions flaring and cursing to myself. I had no idea what it meant, and I really did want to find out, but I was also slightly afraid of the possibilities. Did it mean that this was meant to be? That I was going to become some noble person struck aback by love of another being? I doubted it. Again, it was probably just the ale... But I was too curious to settle with this idea. I sighed. If only I had some fruity druid I could talk to, someone close by, who could help me. I didn't want it to end up that way, because it was too conflicting with my own previous loves. Gold and beer. If I didn't turn in the prisoner, no ale, no money... But her.

But it was impossible. She hated me. How in the hell would we get from hate to love with my attitude and her annoyance? In the dream we had gotten past that. But now, God no. We were at each others throats. Angered by my own confusion, I summoned for my voidwalker, Klathrath, to this world, ordering it to watch the Elf. She was asleep now, too weak to stay up most likely. I left the room and walked downstairs to see Neema and Samuel talking. Neema was the one to notice me first. She glared at me and moved away from her husband to me.

"What in the bloody hell do you think you're doing bringing that _thing_ here?"

"The Elf, or my demons, Neema?"

The bar mistress rolled her eyes and placed her hands on her hips. "Don't play stupid, Nicholas. This is serious. What if that thing gets loose?"

"I doubt she would try to reek havoc on Southshore, most likely she would be running. From who, well me of course. Or well, you, you're a force to be reckoned with. Your eyes are burning into my skull with your fury." I chuckled, and reassured her, "Theres nothing to worry about. She's under my voids control. It has a strong bond, theres a very slim chance of her escape, and even if she did, I told you, she would run."

Feeling the sting of defeat, Neema walked off, over to her husband, who stood beyond the counter cleaning mugs, and kissed him on his slightly wrinkled cheek before disappearing up the stairs to her room. "Samuel," I spoke calmly. He seemed slightly perturbed about something as well. I wasn't surprised, I'm sure anyone in this inn was at the moment. The little elf was probably a slayer of many Alliance people. "Is there something you wish to speak about?"

My tone was serious and the older man took the chance. "I'm just worried about you, Nicholas. That Elf looks like a lot to handle."

"She is, quite a pest."

"Beyond that, I mean. Don't deny it. I watched the way you looked at her while in the inn, earlier. I've seen the look, I've known the feeling. They are alluring creatures." Samuel looked slightly ashamed, but his words were serious as I leaned against the counter. "Are you telling me that you think I'm getting too involved?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. "She's just an elf. Just a prisoner." I reassured him.

He nodded, but my reply didn't satisfy him. "I know you. I've seen you with other women, but never have I seen you look so controlled by one."

"Wait, controlled? You think she's the one in charge? You're mad. I'm obviously in control."

"Not like that." Samuel explained, "You looked lost about something while looking at her, confused almost. It was as if you were obsessed about something related to her."

"I'm not obsessed. She's a Horde! No way. I may tease them, but I don't become obsessed."

"I beg to differ."

But just his words had set me off guard again. He was speaking to me about what I was so very divided by. Her. The Elf. How she could piss me off so easily, yet send my mind into chaos while I watched her bathe, or talk, or sleep – or anything! It all was because of that damned dream! Had I never experienced it, I would be up in my room, sleeping about the money and courtesans I could have. But no, I dreamed of ladies of light and elves.

"It's probably just guilt." Guilt? That was possible. My guilt could be channeled through some off base emotion.. Yes, of course! _Guilt_. Why hadn't I realized this before! Because I had never felt this before.

"Possibly. But don't deny yourself. Don't ignore it. You can tell me, Nicholas."

I stared at he older man. Could he understand? He was already half way informed. I assumed that he as an older man with more experience than I, could. Feeling that there was no choice but to explain to Samuel, I sighed and began telling him of the dream I had had five days ago. He listened openly, holding back his shock, in order for me to continue. I was careful with the details; I didn't want to look like some traitor in the eyes of a man who I trusted. Nonetheless, the old man nodded his head and seemed somehow capable of not taking it all wrong. I then told him of the recent dreams of the Lady of Light.

"But what I don't understand is this prediction she tells me. It describes people whom I do not know, nor have heard of. The setting is of a land I've heard little of and she speaks in riddles, in tongues I don't understand in reality." I ran my hand through my hair, grazing the burn scars lightly. I sighed. It was all so very confusing. Everything that had happened since I had captured the Elf... was crazy in my mind. I couldn't comprehend things normally, I was lost in unconsciousness. And this was beyond agonizing. "I then..." I clear my throat and try to maintain the distinction that I was not losing it, "I then see the prediction before me. A human girl with long black hair, bangs and pale green eyes drinks a vial with a murky yellow mixture inside. Her body contorts, she screams as she trembles and twitches violently for a minute – some kind of transformation. In the background, I hear a shrilly, horrified and muffled scream. Across from the human girl is a dainty elfish creature with faintly glowing eyes who is crying and struggling in her captor's hands. She finally breaks free and runs over to the twisted flesh of a dead human. I believe her words were, _'How could you do this to me? To her? Arìs, fight it! Fight it! Don't give into the Scourge! We can fix things, you know we can... Oh Arìs!' _

"And then the human girl awakens, her eyes now a deathly blue and her skin significantly fainter than before. She is handed a blood stained sword and a vile grin spreads across her face as she stands up. _'I've been waiting for you Jae... dearest sister, I finally will have my revenge for the life you stole...'_"

And then the dream fades as I hear another voice urgently call for "Jae" to climb upon a Bronze Drake. She takes a outstretched hand pulling her away from her sister who's intent is to spill Jae's blood." I sighed. So confusing. I closed my eyes nearly tearing at my hair. What in hell did it all mean? Why was this vision haunting my thoughts?

"I always knew that despite your past, you would somehow grow beyond it."

"What in the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"You know; you clearly do. I knew that you were prone to be dragged into such things, you're young. You can still change things. This Elf could be the very thing you need."

"They'res nothing to change." I replied sternly, defensive almost, "Nothings changed. I'm the same person. Just because_ this fucking Elf is here, doesn't mean I'm changing._ I'm a member of the valiant Alliance, nobly serving my King in his absence. Why, you know me. Always eager to help the dear old governing officers." I was trying so hard not to sound sarcastic. But Samuel could only shake his head in disagreement. He knew quite well I was lying. I hated royalty, I hated being the son of a selfish bastard who couldn't even cry at his own wife's death. I hated being everything about the Alliance. Their cocky attitude, their smug and disgusting way of life. Meh, I was a hypocrite. All of it had rubbed onto me. I was just as bad as them, and it couldn't be helped. Life had been cut into stone the moment I listened to my mother scream a few doors down from my own in the infirmary. But what could you do? You can't change the past. One little domino, one little thing – that's all it takes – topples over onto the other... and you can't stop it. That's how fate worked.

"Samuel, I know who I am. I know that these dreams are just because of the ale –

"Indeed, you have been drinking a lot more lately." _A fine observation, my friend_. But he was merely stating the obvious. I had drunk at least a bottle or two a night until it knocked me out. I despised hearing her try to annoy me to death. At least the ale toned things down. God, what a nuisance. Elves, whether they were Night Elves or Blood Elves, they were forces to be reckoned with, much like Neema (though of course, Neema could be placed into her own category. She was far from human sometimes).

"Besides, what difference would it make. This Elf hates my guts. I don't blame her. I've been this way since she died, my mother. And you know why. Don't toss the past aside just because it's apart of yesterday. I'd rather not make anymore stupid mistakes or generalizations."

"Yes, of course you respect what occurred, but also realize that it did happen. Don't let it impair or cripple – "

"I'm not crippled." I interrupted, rolling my eyes.

" – you.. this could be your chance of a lifetime. Don't let it slip through your fingers, or you'll regret it all your life. This could bring a lot of good into your life, you direly need it, no offense."

"So what, I should just be nice to the prisoner, a fiend in the eyes of many? Somehow become pleasant to her? She wouldn't buy it. I don't know anything about her."

"Find out more about her."

"Christ, I'm shocked an honorable member of our fine faction is telling me to relate to a member of the horde. Man, what's this world coming to." Sarcasm stung my words heavily, a venomous statement. "Nicholas... you know what I mean. I've always been one to believe in destiny. Whether she's on our side or not, don't fight it. Lady Fate finds a way."

"Whatever you say, Samuel." I stood up all the way then, stretched my back, then walked out the inn door, "I'm going to go get some fresh air. Good night."

Outside, the dim moonlight shimmered over the stone and wooden buildings. The air was fresh, clean pine air. I walked quietly up the main road, staring at the cobblestone and dirt path beneath my soles. The town was silent beyond the rustle of the branches in the wind. To the right, were homes with tiny shutters covering the windows were people slept calmly. Bah, they weren't troubled by such thoughts, such visions. I didn't want to think about her. That's why I had left the inn. But her presence lingered, hanging on my mind like a dead, limp weight. This was partly because of the demonic bond the voidwalker and I shared, which would alert me should something happen. Through it's connection, I could feel her, sense her holy aura from miles away; I could reach out from my mind and grasp her conscience and see what she saw or dreamed, but only through the demon's bond, as well as letting it consume almost all my energy. I was nearly out of it, I didn't need to speed up the process.

It's amazing, seeing what creatures do when they're desperate.

* * *

We spent three days in Southshore, waiting for a ship to arrive, which would take us to Menethil. Of course, the vessel had arrived late due to a storm along the Arathi coastline. Samuel's words were like a broken record in my mind. I pondered about them, letting them dawdle in my conscience while we waited for yet two more days. Neema was her usual self, full of contempt and hatred toward the blood elf when she came into our room to bring her meal. This was my way, of course, of torturing the ole' sea hag. Served her right, I didn't know what the hell was her problem, it wasn't like Elirina was so wild elf beleaguering Neema whenever she came in. No, the elf would simply watch her. I figured that they each had something that they had to learn. That contempt simply was a waste of energy. After the first three days in Southshore, Neema began to ignore her dislike, and I guess tried to be more civil. When this happened, I'd be sleeping in my room, or downstairs drinking some ale and then asking Chii what went on. I guess you could say they had "girl" talk. According to Chii, the last night of our stay, was the most peculiar of evenings. Neema and the elf were having a conversation about myself, the first time I had come up in a conversation since we had arrived. I assumed that over these two days the two of them had become close in some confusing, unusual way. Neema didn't really have anyone to talk to other than the woman who sometimes passed by, or would she listen to the occasional gossip that spread throughout the land. So this was new for her.

Chii, unfortunately was vague about the details, but the elf had explained her dream the night of her capture to Neema...

"I don't understand a word of it, I really don't... It's all so very confusing. I don't want this, I don't want this to be happening. If I had known that the stealing of such documents was going to lead to this, I think I would have just ignored it..."

"It's that bad?"

"He's a hedonist, obviously, I'm sure you've noticed...Listen, I know that my people have done the Alliance wrong, with the whole "Sunwell" and being apart of the 3rd war, and such, but Neema, I really must ask you something. I haven't been able to talk to a female for nearly a month now. It's impossible to think clearly with him around, it's like some mind-boggling, combative conflict in my mind." She paused, running a hand through her auburn hair. "You have to understand, I've never been with a man... not in this kind of way. I have no idea what I'm doing, I could just be mistaking this all for extreme despise... He wants me dead! Not because of my actions, but because he enjoys it! He's so confusing, so twisted and yet disturbingly charming. I.. I don't know how to interpret this..."

Neema's dark brown eyes stared intently into her green orbs, not repulsed or angered at the sight in front of her, "You have to understand, Nicholas may be unreasonable, nearly intolerable... but, they'res something beneath him. Trust me. I met his mother once, when they were traveling to Stormwind for his brother's funeral. She was a lovely woman. Petite, gentle, who silently lamented her son's death. They waited here for two days as well, waiting for the ship to Menethil. We talked, I met her younger son, Nicholas, who at the time was 11. A bit naïve, but despite his age, he was growing into a fine young man. There was no doubt in my mind that he would be successful and happy, despite the loses. He was a dreamer, he still is.

"You have to understand that everything has a cause and effect, everything happens for a reason, or at least I live my life believing that. There was a fire in Stormwind, three years after their arrival there." The elf's eyes were hard, almost as if she were remembering the burn scar on my face as she watched Neema, "It nearly killed him, burned him head to toe on half of his body. His mother died of an infection from the open wounds. Had it not been for her, Nicholas would either be dead, or in a far graver state at that time. It was entirely an accident, yet he blamed himself for it... I guess you could say that when I heard the news, I was horrified, and I urged for him to come stay with us. You know, Samuel and I never had any children, a tavern isn't the place for children, though I felt connected to Nicholas. Like a son, almost. He never came, until 10 years later, as the man he is now."

"I'm sorry."

"There is nothing to be sorry about. Nicholas made his choices, he's an adult, I can't control him. I only wish that he would have not been so reckless as he has been over the years."

"That explains a lot, it really does." The elf smiled half-heartedly as her eyes casted toward the ground. "I guess I'm jumping to conclusions, I'm not giving this much thought because I know that in th end he'll either kill me, or simply let the alliance guard take care of it."

"You never know."

This conversation was relayed to me that night, in demonic by Chii while I took a walk outside. It was amazing how much I truly had to respect Neema for all the things that she did for me. I had suddenly felt so horrible, disgusted in myself for my cruelty that she bore. God, it made me so angry! All this trouble, just because of the elf. Sheesh.

It was something I had to take account of, I guess, for I couldn't deny that something was indeed happening. But the night passed, and the shipped arrived, late. Everything was spelling disaster or uncertainty. The elf was extremely hard to be near now. There was no where to run, no where to hide in our tiny cabin room on the boat. There were only three other people traveling to Menethil by this route. A merchant, who would also be joining us on the trip to Stormwind, a rogue and a mage. Since room was scarce due to it being a cargo ship, we were crammed together in the leftover compartments. I greatly hated this. There wasn't much room on the ship's deck, and there was a medium size galley for meals and general interaction with those else on board. The mage, a female draenai with fair light blue skin, was probably my only means of escape in terms of something to do. She told me about her life, where she was coming from on her journey of perfecting her talents. I hated sitting in the room, just staring at the ceiling hearing her sleep quietly in her corner of the room, so she was something different in my life. Her name was Elysia. The rogue, on the other hand, was a cutthroat member of the Argent Dawn who was also heading to Stormwind with news of the battle there. I personally did not know much of this war and I was curious to know what it was about beyond Scourge invasions. While playing poker, the rogue, the mage and I discovered several new things, things I had never realized throughout my life. I had no idea of the extent of tragedy and dislocation that the people of those towns had felt. The Battle for Darrowshire, they said, was the worst so far. I knew nothing of the despair and lament that the Argent Dawn saw every day while fighting for these lands. I guess that wasn't my thing. I didn't enjoy war. War was just another thing to deteriorate the mind. In other news, the rogue knew about a land called Northrend. This caught my attention, because the dream mentioned Northrend. The snowy wasteland was barren for the most part, but there were plenty of rumors, according to Allen, the rogue, that something was going to happen there in the near future. Elysia agreed, the priests of the Argent Dawn could sense turmoil stirring in the midst of the terror already. Northrend, I had heard that word several times in my sleep, as well as once in real life. Northrend was the land my father was shipped off to. I had heard nothing of him since my Mother's funeral, I knew nothing of the land, or what lied there. No one really knew.

* * *

Inside my cabin, I tried to fall asleep for the longest time. Thoughts raced through my head, notions, ideas, things that simply did not want to let go. I think it was because of her, the elf. Well, I didn't really have to think about. It was something I knew, she was always doing something to bother me... as always... this _wasn't _new. It was, I guess, a chilly evening at sea. The storm that had delayed the vessel was still bombarding the coast with rain and wild winds. The ship swayed, sometimes gently and sometimes coarsely making my head even more dazed and off. Everything was like a horrible combination of petulances that kept me off guard. She was curled up into a ball, staring at me as I laid in the bed, trying desperately to fall asleep. Huddling to stay warm, I could hear her teeth clattering and her breath come in sharply. This wouldn't do. I couldn't sleep knowing this, the guilt was finally getting to me.

Sighing, I sat up and returned her gaze, almost inquisitively. Her eyes followed every move that I made as I moved over to her. I knelt before her peering at her in the darkness. Could she see me? How panicked I was inside? How I had evolved over the days had amazed me. She was innocently confused when I picked her up and moved her to the bed. For a moment she freaked out, worried that my intentions were different – heh. No, she calmed down when she saw me leaving. I couldn't handle the tension that I was creating. I was flaring up underneath my tunic and trousers.

That night, when I returned, she was asleep. Slightly in a haze from some light alcohol, I got into the sheets next to her with my right arm propping me up. Her expression caught me off guard. She was like a dainty angel, with light eyelashes resting on her cheeks and the soft sigh of her lips. I figured she was dreaming away, lost in her own reality, her freedom, her happiness. I simply laid there, watching her. What else was I supposed to do? I couldn't sleep for crap, I couldn't think clearly, I couldn't do anything inside the crammed room, I couldn't go on a walk with the pouring rain – not a thing to do! At that moment, I began to hate traveling my boat intensely.

I let my mind wander. It was becoming so late in the evening, that I really was not in tune to my thoughts, I was off, tipsy and sluggish. I thought about the future, just thinking, pondering the idea of my previous dream life. Wife, child, home. The three things of my past. Ale, women, gold. The three things of the present. But what of the future? What of the world of tomorrow? What then? By all means, there was someone out there laughing wildly, someone who knew this was going to happen. I guess there were plenty of warning signs. But then again, it could be mistaken for several things. I was jumping off the rail, diving into something that could have been trifling matters. But even such sordid thoughts were appealing. I loved the idea, but it was so hard to let go. You become dependent on things, things that become a cripple and a strength all at once. There isn't a way to combine them, only a way to break them apart further, or entirely. You can't just have these feelings one day...

A large jolt erupted as the contents of the tiny room slid to the right some, tipping. The bed crashed into the right wall, leaving a slight dent. I could hear both the elf and the person next door stir, grouchy most likely. The vessel was swaying in the heavy winds and rain, as most boats did during storms such as these. Mist fell through the window as the wind changed direction, blowing droplets of heavy rain into the room. Now the elf was really waking up, bothered by the sudden extra chill in the room. She looked up, blinked and noticed me.

"The storm must be getting worse, the ships swaying vigorously." She nodded, rubbing her eye, yawning faintly. She was about to go back to sleep, when she sat up, turned and began, "Your name is Nicholas, isn't it?"

"Indeed it is. Neema told you it, didn't she."

"Ya, she did. I asked. You know, you could have honored me by telling me."

But even in the faint light, I could see that her cheeks were darker some. Her eyes were wider, and her breathing was once again hitched. "Why... why do you have that burn on your face" She asked after dead silence.

"You already know."

"I know but... what happened."

"There was a fire in Stormwind."

"But, obviously it must have been a crazy – "

"Stormwind didn't have an efficient infirmary with doctors and priests at the time."

"I see..." She reached out and touched my cheek, moving lightly over the scar, almost as if she were trying to read the memories that rushed back to my mind. The flames, the charred flesh, my mothers last words, her screams from down the hall, my own... _She's just messing with you, she's just..._

But my thoughts became stalled as I let my eyes close. I took her hand in mine and I sighed. What was I supposed to do? There was poison in this rain as it lightly blew against my face from the open window. I was losing it. In the darkness, her eyes fell in a hopeless manner. She looked away, towards the pillow, squeezing it tightly, gripping my hand as well. "Are you really that greedy – that cruel? That cold-hearted, to simply just not let me go? To just set me free and live on with your life? Surely there must be something you enjoy, something more to your life?" Her voice was weak, trembling and lost.

Silence filled the air again as I contemplated. "As Neema told you, and as you stated, I have nothing waiting for me other than a pile of gold and some drinking buddies in Stormwind." I was defensive, state of factish and clear.

"_But is that, are they really that important to you?"_

_No, they aren't. I spoke in my mind. _Quickly I closed my eyes, blocking that out. "I can't stay traveling without the usual ale or courtesan as well as a pile of gold to buy it all."

"But there is nothing else, nothing else to your life?"

"As you clearly stated, I'm a hedonist."

"...wait a minute." The realization was coming over her. That I had been listening in on their conversations, or that I had conveniently placed Chii inside my room while I was gone. She let go of the hand that I was holding, disgusted, "You... you dirty fiend! How dare you destroy my privacy in that way!" She was flaring with anger, "I knew you were a monster, but I didn't think it was this bad!"

A... monster...?

The term at first didn't register, I felt like a strong blow had been taken to my chest, like the wind had been knocked out of me. I had been called worst things, sure... but hearing it from her... it all, fell onto me. I couldn't reply with anything, I couldn't think without self-pity, without the idea of how horrible of a person I was, damnit! _This wasn't supposed to happen!_ I froze before her, shutting my eyes and feeling the sting of cold defeat. I ran a hand through my hair, trying desperately to recompose myself. "Well... did you think I was going to be a Knight in shining armor? A hero in disguise, despite the demons and curses? The title, Knight...its simply that, just a title."

"It's a worthless existence then."

"I guess."

"How can you live this way!?"

"I manage, I'm pleased as I'll ever be."

"But you don't know that, Neema said – "

"Neema is an old woman who believes in true love, fairy tales, happy endings and good overcoming evil. She believes that the Alliance are good and that the Horde are evil. She thinks your evil, corrupt. She's a blind old woman who doesn't know a damn well thing about me. She lives in the idea that change comes secretly. It's not _that_ simple! Life isn't a god damn children's picture book with rainbows and cordial knights who escort the princess to the castle. You make your choices, you _fucking_ deal, and you get on with life. That's how I live. If you don't like it, then shut your mouth and go back to bed." I scowled for a moment, without realizing what I had just said until the second after. I panicked. I felt that I had made a crucial mistake and I quickly tried to say something else. I couldn't let my chance, although I was barely realizing it, for... But, in the end, she beat me to it.

"Wait, Eli, listen –

" Don't you dare call me 'Eli', you sick bastard. How dare you tell me to close my mouth, I really shouldn't take any of your rude, meaningless behavior from you. I don't need a sword to punch you in the face, I don't need armor to defend myself. I ought to... But of course, I can't, now can I? You think you're so superior with your silly bond. If you were a real man, you wouldn't defend yourself in this way, you would fight me, bond with rope or kill me instantly. A real man doesn't hide behind magic or dresses. A _real_ man fights like one, a real man kills with his bare hands instead of controlling their body to death. No, just because you think you're so powerful, doesn't mean you are. And you think that just because you're unhappy with your life, that everything else is horrible as well! You don't give life a chance! I don't know what the hell happened to you during those ten years, but it twisted you! Neema had so many hopes for you, she cared for you! Worried about you after your mother's death! Would want your mother to see you like this? As an odious, sinful man? _You_, Nicholas, are a gluttonous man who will suffer for eternity for your petty, wasteful life. What could be so miserable that you couldn't just grow up! You're clinging to something that isn't real, that doesn't care. You're a waste of flesh, a waste of breat –

My sullen expression suddenly caught her off guard. It wasn't one of hatred or sudden viciousness. Everything she said, everything, every single thing shook me. Her venom was flowing through my veins, infecting each part of me. I felt an ache in my chest as she defended herself bluntly. I couldn't look at her, I felt disgusting, sick. For the first time it seemed in years, I felt true guilt, true remorse. How easily her words or emotions could influence me, turn me from annoyed and angered to beaten and torn. I sat there, feeling the pinch of her words stinging me as a whole. I looked back up at her, my eyes catching hers in a sincere glance. I pulled her to me slowly, so that I could solemnly mutter in her ear,

"I'm sorry for being a monster."


	5. The Nostalgia Part I

**Chapter 4**

_**Disclaimer** : I don't own World of Warcraft, or the places mentioned. My characters and plot are mine._

It had been merely inclination, I believe, that set me apart from the rest of my family. I guess you could say I had a strong bond with my mother, partly because she was the person I had spent most of my time with while growing up. She was a petite lady with her short red hair and blue eyes. Her name was Mina. She was your average mother of two ambitious sons, losing one to battle in the harsh icy lands of Northrend. She spoke of quiet things after Daniel's, my brother, death. However before then, she never raised her voice in a hurtful way, she never said cruel things – rather, she took care of that silly mutt and me. Hinterlands was her kind of homeland, she enjoyed the fresh pine air and the sweet smell of Sungrass in the summer. It was the death of an era when Daniel died, and we left for Stormwind. Father wasn't there for the funeral. Apparently he had been out at war, fighting in either Northrend or Outlands, we truly did not know. Mother received no letters, no telegrams or any form of information about him over the years, and I always figured that he was dead. Mother couldn't give into that idea. She sometimes would come into my room at night, while in Stormwind, and just hold me tightly, crying quietly to herself about her son and the possible death of the man she loved. For this, I began to hate my father. She loved him so much, my mother, and constantly did she try to learn about his fate. To her dislike, we never knew. He was just a figment of her memory and a painted picture in my mind.

When she died, he surprisingly showed up for her funeral. He, indeed, looked like her photos. Tall, wild hair and eyes that hid most of his face as it billowed in the wind. A fierce face, composed of scars and bruises, could not even shed a tear. We caught glances, and I, only being 14 ran after him screaming at him, blaming him. Had we never gone to Stormwind, had Daniel never died, had my father not forced Daniel to join the army, had my father been a craftsman... she _wouldn't_ have died. My father had abandoned a wife who loved him, adored him. I couldn't see what it was she cherished in him, found so "knightly". And thus, he left with his plate boots clattering against the wet cobblestone path. Tears ran down my face as I watched him go, running up to him until I was inches away from him. I pulled at his cape, and he stopped walking. Quite frankly, I cursed my family name, telling him that I would never grow up to be the man that he was; the kind that left and never came back. Once I couldn't think of anymore hateful things to say to him, I sighed. I was panting for breath, rubbing my eyes angrily, and trying to wipe the shameful tears from my eyes. Seconds after, he turned and looked over his shoulder. I couldn't see his expression. I didn't want to see it. He deserved any and all contempt at that time. But he exhaled slowly, and walked away.

Years later, I began to rationalize why he had been gone for so long. I knew nothing of the lands beyond the Eastern Kingdoms, but I knew that wherever he fought, that things were hard. He didn't choose to be in the army, the army chose him. However, I could never grasp the idea of why my mother fell for him. But then again, mother never told me of such stories. The only things I did know, was that at one time, they were happy, and that it was not an arranged marriage. I knew nothing of what Daniel was like either. Daniel was however, talked about more often than father. Daniel apparently was joyful and fun to be around. He was funny, charming; the kind of guy that everyone got along with. Apparently he had been killed by a demon of the Black Temple, in Outlands. He died with dignity and grace, and mother was at least proud of this. She cried, but I couldn't at his funeral. It was like I was going to some stranger's funeral. I knew of him, but I did not _know_ him. For once a several days I dreamed of something other than women of light, demons or _her_. I dreamed of them, my deceased family.

But finally after all these years had I found a new petulance to my sanity. Boats, ships. Worst invention ever made. So.. much tilting and swaying. I couldn't believe it; it was probably the worst feeling I had ever felt in my gut. God, I seriously wanted to get off the boat right then and there the next morning, day Three of our glorious adventure to Stormwind on Nostalgia, the oh-so-fine vessel we had to sadly stay on for several weeks. It all depended on the weather. But each sudden tilt struck at me like a wrong chord to a harp. It made me dizzy, nauseous almost. I couldn't handle it. I nearly wanted to jump off, and leave myself to the fishes. It was that horrible. The captain of Nostalgia thought differently however. He was a crude, scruffy middle aged man who wore sailor garments. His clothes were tattered and frayed, with bloodstains on the cuffs. At his belt was a long cutlass and a revolver that were his pride and joy, next to the very ship itself. The man considered himself a pirate; however, his crew always rolled their eyes at the idea. His name was Duncan D'irais. Duncan was fascinated in the elf, finding it peculiar how she could speak common. The Elf's usual reply to this was, _"All paladins have to learn the opposing factions most widely used language, it prevents miscommunication during wartime. We as elves may have deterred from the lights holy ways, but we as Paladins stand as one when facing a common enemy. Plus, it helps if you're a spy."_

Over the course of a few days, Elysia, Allen, Duncan, and I would occasionally play cards in the galley. The head cook would prepare us a meal, and we would be good to go. Duncan and Allen drank often, however, I tried to avoid the temptation. I really hated being drunk around Elirina. She seemed to be more annoying while I was, rather than a babbling voice of my memory. Elysia and Allen were also interested in the Elf. They had seen elves before (fought against them, rather), but never had they had the opportunity to meet one in person. This ship was like neutral ground; the Alliance members and the single Horde seemed to coexist, in a way that wasn't harmful or biased to one side. Duncan treated all travelers equally, prisoner or not. Under my eye, I let Elirina come with me to the mess hall, or the front of the ship.

On the Fourth day of the voyage, the storm had simmered some to frequent drizzles. I took her out to the front of the ship on this day. I couldn't handle her appearance, her innocent beauty as she stepped out onto the deck that morning. Dainty bare feet met a drenched wooden deck as she walked out of the stairway leading down. Her wispy white dress was new, a gift from Elysia apparently. It had short sleeves with elegant, lacy ends. The fabric hugged her frame loosely, yet in a way that showed her body's curves. Goosebumps were on her arms, obviously she was cold despite her attempts to push the idea away. I watched her, outstretched my hand for her, and pulled her in. She had gotten over our fight awhile ago, seeing also that it was useless to be angry. In fact, things were changing. She smiled more often, and she seemed more airy and careless. Carefully I pulled her into me, as if we were about to dance in the light rain. Openly she accepted me, to my surprise. Jolts surged throughout my veins, subtle sparks that ignited when we touched. We had discovered this the day before, where I took her hand when she slipped on the deck (which I couldn't help but laugh at, she eventually dragged me down with her, as well, which was also comical).

I brought her to the edge, her back against my chest as I held her. "Close your eyes." I whispered, unsure if I was pushing this too far, or if I was letting my emotions take control. I wanted to experiment, and hell, I was going to!

She breathed in sharply as my hand brushed her stomach. "Shh"

I was trembling inside, this was becoming overwhelming. I closed my eyes and just let myself absorb it all. With her right hand in mine, I lifted her hand to touch my cheek. Her fingers brushed the burn, sending sensations down my spine. Our eyes caught each other in a stare. I simply just wanted to tell her that despite how confusing or wrong it all was, she made me feel real. For once, I felt human despite the contortions to my physical heart. Eli brought new life to my once dull existence, I could finally admit after three weeks of traveling with her. For years, I had lived a life of well, blind nostalgia, a world of meaningless and trivial matters that I believed to enjoy. Everything I did then, was stupid, wrong or unneeded. I had wasted ten years of my life. Unfortunately, such a path led me to her. I couldn't understand anything anymore; I was questioning my actions, being affected by things I wouldn't care for, worrying about her, thinking about my subconscious' visions constantly, gazing at her, wondering what on Earth she thought of, being agonized by her anger towards me, feeling the pinch of helplessness whenever I criticized my behavior, whenever she criticized me... it all was so redundant. I refused to admit anything, yet here I was. Holding her to me, almost claiming her as mine. Almost, but not quite.

But fate began to pull at my heartstrings, our eyes closed and we _both_ leaned in. Our lips brushed lightly, timidly, as if testing the waters. For seconds we stayed still, waiting for us to be caught, or for memory to push us away. Nothing happened. Eagerly I took my chance, I caressed her cheek, closing the gap in between us. Her lips were soft, perfectly molded to mine. But the sparks flew; I felt like a heavy weight had been taken off my shoulders, as if I were entirely at peace without any care in the world. It was like a mixing of light and dark, polar opposites that, when melted together, were made for each other. It was beyond anything I could explain; it was liberation and despair all at once. Mixed feelings hung in my heart as my thoughts raced. I wanted to enjoy it, I really did, however, my panicked thoughts wouldn't rest. When she pulled away, her mouth was agape. She lifted a finger to touch her lips, feeling a tingling reaction to such a meeting. Looking away, she frowned.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled, feeling regret for my actions as I backed off, unable to look at her.

She shook her head. The seal on her neck was pulsating rapidly. Was she scared, worried? Was she just as panicked as me? Did she know, could she understand? Didn't she see, that the very thing that we had committed was a crime? No, probably not. But seriously? Since when did I care about breaking the law?

I ran a hand through my hair, tugging at the roots some. It was all so very frustrating, thinking about this or that, the anxiety... Strange, foreign emotions churned in me, torturing my every limb. _What did you just do! Why – how could you let this happen? You should have just killed her..., _My conscience screamed at me. _You're only making things..._

"Nicholas." She spoke softly from behind. With a tone that was not critical or lost, she spoke my name. I had to close my eyes and relish in the way she said it. The way she made the vowels and consonants flow, as if they were whole. My heart throbbed, jumping into my throat. _I can't even breathe, I can't even form a coherent sentence... _"Let's go inside."

I turned, nodding, after I had composed myself. Neither of us mentioned it in the hours to come. Was it for the shame she felt? That I felt? Probably. But I didn't want to think of that angle. I suddenly had been pushed into a child's fairytale, specifically a girl's, where there was a chivalrous knight and a fair maiden... Innocent romance growing from the roots of their modest behavior, stealing glances, giggling, smiling, feeling free. God, it was coming all together. Why couldn't I see it before, the way my heart seemed to pound when I was horrible with her, or if she was in a state of complete and utter interest. Samuel... was right, in a way. I couldn't allow this to happen, but there was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. The noose around my neck was tightening, forming a tighter hold around my neck. This of course could mean a lot of things. That, one, I was losing it, two, I was going insane, or three, both. I had never been a man to confront these sort of things, for it had only happened once over the years, to my dismay. My personality, sadly, tore us apart. Not only that, but I was naïve.

But aside from that, hours turned to days, and our own bashful shame held us back. We hardly talked and when we did, we usually were exchanging few words. Elysia and Duncan were suspicious, sensing tension in the air that churned around the elf and I. After a long time, I figured that it was bound to happen. I knew it was all coming together, but my conscience wouldn't allow it. Oh well. Fate seemed to want to take its course, and by all means, I was interested in seeing where it would take me. And every time I looked at her, I felt a chilling wave of curiosity wash over me. But each time this happened, I'd peel my eyes away, and scold myself. _Get over it_.

* * *

In the faint light of my cabin, she was laying against the wall with her eyes lightly closed. I had recently chosen to provide her with a blanket that she could use, should she choose to. Her eyes opened when the door opened, and I, in a daze, stumbled in. The elf's nose twitched, smelling the ale on my breath. She sighed and tried to ignore me. I grunted some, rubbing my forehead as I walked over to the bed. My head was throbbing; I hadn't had alcohol in two weeks, and I was a bit sore from it. I couldn't resist it. I needed something to take my mind off the confusion that plagued my mind. And indeed it did, until I managed to find my way back to my cabin, where she waited. The Fel Hunter had already suckled away for the evening, and it had lazily fallen asleep next to her, it's tethers still tightly around her leg. She grimaced some as she tried to move her leg away. Another wonderful component to the Fel Hunter's mana-siphoning ability, was the talons that protruded from the thin strip of flesh. Obviously, the talons helped for the victim to stay unmovable while the siphoning took place. Of course, this also was extremely painful. The elf was whimpering as the talons tore at her flesh, clinging eagerly to her pale skin. I looked up and noticed her trying to release the grip. Drunkenly I stumbled over and violently pulled her away, leaving a significant gash in her right thigh. She whelped loudly, cursing at me, for once in English.

"What the hell did you do that for... Damnit you don't even know how much that fucking hurt."

"I'm really not in the mood to deal with your whining, so shut it." I growled.

She rolled her eyes, "When are you in the mood to deal with it?"

"Good question. I'm sure I could snap those thin lips shut if aim correctly. Though, I wouldn't mind wiping that snobby smirk entirely off your face first." I watched her hands move to the broken flesh on her thigh, her hands turning a faint white as it attempted to heal the wound. The light simmered, but died out in her exhaustion. Panting now, she sighed, her smirk turning into a frown. Blood was staining her once beautiful white gown that Elysia had given her. Closing her eyes she looked dizzy and a bit unsure of what was going on. I watched her for a few moments, until I let out a stern breath of air. "You won't be able to heal yourself in this condition."

"Oh please, I've done it several times before. Your gluttonous vermin for a demon isn't helping, nevertheless. I know what to do," She tried again, forcing magic to be expelled from her palm, only draining her further. I sighed in annoyance, "You know nothing of demonic wounds, do you. It's Fel Magic, thus making it immune to Holy Light. You Blood Knights think you know everything in the world about Warlocks and demons, when in reality, you're just as ignorant and naïve as any other stupid paladin. I swear, too many of you are the same. _For once,_ _surprise me_." I walked over to my backpack and pulled out a roll of bandage and herbs I had bought on the last day in Southshore. Next, I moved over to her, kneeling before her. The wound had stopped bleeding, but Fel Magic simmered in the gash. I mixed the herbs with some spare water into a goo that I then poured onto the open area, after cleaning the dried blood off. She groaned, clenching her fists tightly as it stung. After the mixture had been absorbed, I slid her dress up with my fingers lightly touching her skin as I moved up. Instantly her skin ignited into molten fire. The Elf turned away, as I noticed her face flush. She wasn't resistant to my sudden actions; rather, she was trying her best to make it seem as if it didn't matter. These efforts failed, however. Purposefully, I experimented, curious to see just how far she was interested in the matter. As I wrapped the bandage about her thigh, my fingertips brushed her inner leg, causing her to tremble or to sigh softly against her will. I grazed her sensitive flesh almost expecting her to yell out at me. Surprisingly, she did nothing of the sort. I couldn't help but frown when the bandage was tightly around the wound, ready to be tied together. For seconds I sat still, my hands still on her thigh as I stared at her, unsure of what to do or think. She simply returned my gaze and blinked a few times. She couldn't understand as well what was happening, or why it was. Certainly it was churning deep within us, something we couldn't handle, yet something we were somehow able to embrace it in our own ways. Denial.

I soon moved my hands away and fetched one of my old tunics that I used to wear while in the colder regions of Azeroth. "Here, you can wear this instead of that bloody thing."

She blinked, confused. For once she decided to ask the question that I couldn't accurately answer, or honestly as well, "But why, why are you helping me after saying that you don't care about my existence, how I'm so 'falsely brave'..."

I couldn't think of a straightforward response, because clearly, I was in too much denial to give a reasonable reply. So I simply shrugged and turned around, allowing her to change in what minuscule privacy I permitted. Sighing, she removed the stained white gown and put my shirt on.

"Okay."

I turned again and noticed how it barely covered her lower half. "Eh..." I couldn't look at her, not without seeing several images in my mind. The dreams, that accidental brush of lips... I had to shut my mind off from those thoughts. "I'm sure I have a spare pair of pants..."

But of course, I didn't. I had three different colored shirts, but only the pair of pants that I wore. I groaned, _of course...You idiot. _"It's fine... I can make a sarong out of a sheet." She mumbled, slowly standing up with the help of the wall as something to lean against. I pulled the upper layer of the white sheets off the bed, handing it to her. She folded it once, then wrapped it around her, tying the ends together. "It's not much, but it's better than nothing, I guess."

I suddenly felt guilty for ripping Chii's tether away from her, feeling stupid as well for doing so. Had I done nothing, she would have been in pain, but none of this would have happened. It was one of those situations where either possibility quite frankly, sucked. Guilt's an irritating thing. Makes you do things that most likely wouldn't happen otherwise. Ale does this as well, only the actions committed have more "extreme" effects. This was slowly turning into one of those moments, as much as I permitted it. We stood there again, staring at each other in awkward silence. All of it made me want to punch a wall or to get angry, because for the first time in so long, it was something that I couldn't control. I couldn't control the way she responded to me, how she acted... and oddly enough I was starting to think I had lost control over my own self. Ticked off, I ran a hand through my thick hair turning away from her some.

"You know," her voice began, penetrating my ear and my thoughts, "the only reason you drink is to forget things. And I'm curious... what has you so worked up that forces you to drink when you've been sober for oh so long."

_Eh, her sarcasm_, I thought as I rubbed my eyes groaning. _Just what I need. _

"Bad memories," I rolled my eyes with the slight idea that things were going to go sour again, " and you're so annoying..."

"Me? Annoying?" She raised her voice now, " As I've said, that demon of yours is a nuisance. You constantly make it feed, do you know how painful that is? Has it ever lunged at you?"

"Plenty of times when I was gaining control over it, probably worse than training the succubus to stop seducing me."

"Well that's fine and dandy. I'm guessing that's one bad memory you'd like to forget, hm?"

"Shut it, or I'll snap your jaw shut."

"I'd like to see you try with those skinny arms of yours. OOo, is there even muscle there?"

_Fucking antagonizing...She wants me to get angry, so that I'll storm out and leave her alone. _

"Though, I guess you don't have a record of being the hand-to-hand combat kind of guy, with you're silly curses and all, guess that makes you... oh, 10% of a man?"

"And you, you're the one who fell so easily to it? Needing a large sword to do your job for you? And it makes you 100% less of a female."

This set her off, she growled and glared. "Female enough for you to betray your faction's laws. Female enough for you to be attracted to me."

"And I guess I'm man enough for you to enjoy it."

Stalemate. Our insults were matched, we couldn't think of anything else to say to each other. But we had also just been pushed face to face with what we had been denying for so long. What could be said? What could be done? I couldn't let her go, not when my old lifestyle was at stake. My previous dreams had been crushed long ago, I wasn't sure... I couldn't lose another life again. And yet, here I was. It frustrated me, bothered me to my core how I wasn't able to shake it all loose.

"Please, how do you know I'm not flattering you, shutting you up for a little while?"

"You're not the type that would flatter. If you don't like something, you say something against it. You don't like me when I drink, so you ask why I do it. Because of this, it proves that you're just as interested."

"That makes absolutely no sense! I hate you! You're a hypocritical, selfish, drunkard for a man who takes pleasure in seeing people unhappy!"

"I wouldn't go as far as to say, 'seeing people unhappy'. But sweetie, you're just as bad as me, if not worse. At least I don't strut around with the idea that I'm an honorary member of my faction. You don't have to lie, look at you here. You're just as attracted -" I stopped her from saying anything, by quickly placing my hand over her mouth, "and if you aren't, then I dare you to say something against this."

And with that, I removed my hand and crashed onto her lips, forcefully and eagerly. She struggled for a moment, in the hopes of trying to uphold her glorious values against my subtle advances. Her resistance to me was unmatched, because eventually she eased into it, grasping her hands into mine, closing the space in between us. I ran my hands through her hair, gliding over her scalp with my fingertips as her own hands cupped my broken face. For seconds later, we stayed very still, until we parted. Her eyes opened to see my own, our emerald orbs caught in the others trance. What were we to say? What was there that could be done. Simple chemistry molded us together. It was as if her hand was perfectly shaped to hold my cheek and my lips were soft enough just for her. Everything – all of it – was blasphemy, and she was most likely going to regret it the next day, or week, or month, or whatever. But all of it was connected in some form or another. The dreams we shared, that ignited a passionate fascination in the other. Next came our separate conversations with the Andersons, how they each knew that this was all coming together, the ship being late, the tight space, the forced encounters with the other on a daily basis, how we started hating each other – God. _It was so foolish!_ But neither of us could doubt or oppose it's strong hold. Whatever it was, it had us good. And somehow, someone up in the sky was laughing at how easily we could be influenced. The lady of light, maybe? Probably.

* * *

**A/N**: A bit of a kicking the story into gear a bit on the 'romance' issue. It's my little creation from a week of being sick with the flu, or God knows what. A bit of writer's block as well. I had to insert more romance, I need it for my own sanity.

Review if you'd like, I'm open to all forms of responses.


	6. The Nostalgia Part II

Chapter 4

Part II

2nd Floor Balcony

_**Disc**__**laimer:**__ I do not own Warcraft, or any of the graphical places of NPCs mentioned. My characters and plot are mine, however._

_**This chapter has bits of gore, strong language and a sorta, kinda, not really lemon. **_

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* * *

  
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As life seems to always want to torture me, it took four days to get to Menethil harbor, where two days were spent unloading and reloading cargo. In this tiny, boisterous Wetlands village, the people were not surprised to see the Blood Elf walking beside me, with the demonic bond around her wrists as we headed to the inn. They scowled, screamed out obscenities or insults, or angry remarks about her faction. Nothing positive was stated throughout the entire time there, other than pats on the back for "riding the world of yet another opposer to our lifestyle". Any other elf, and I wouldn't care. But no, things had changed in a way. I couldn't handle these things, they didn't know, they didn't understand. And that's when I knew what was happening for sure. I had to fake a grin or a laugh, just to show that I wasn't any different in their eyes. Stifling a traitorous action had never been this difficult, but that was in the past. That evening, I let the elf get some more sleep in our inn room alone, while Allen, Duncan and I had some drinks with the people of Menethil.

I sat at the counter drinking some bourbon with people around me, congratulating my success.

"Was she hard to subdue?" Some random man asked. I shrugged.

"Not really." Why not humor them some? Would shut them up for awhile. "She put up a fight, as most of her faction do, but eventually she fell to me."

"Heh. Barbaric creatures."

"Shcum of the Earth."

"They're only good for fuckin' when you're desperate...hic! Nice and thin, and boy they're shcreamers –

"Lovely ass on that one, Nicholas... Mmm, I could bang that, if she weren't a villain."

And the comments ran on throughout the evening. Allen was his usual quiet self, drinking his ale next to the large fireplace, pondering. When a new "creative" insult was said, he would glance at me, and see my reaction. It also was so distasteful that I nearly wanted to throw up. These men were just as traitorous as I my own thoughts were, which sickened me. Plus, I had been just as bad as these citizens in my past. _God, to think I used to be just like them..._ Hell, that was a lie._ I am just like them. _But... could it be different, though? I had more respect than that, or it was evolving in me. I saw Elirina as a beautiful and whimsical woman, who I couldn't keep my mind off of. It was different. It had to be. But as the night waned on, and the crowd diminished. The innkeeper, Allen and many of the townspeople, who had been there to congratulate me, had left in the early hours of the evening. I appreciated this, but soon enough began to regret this. Eventually, their comments began to rub off onto me until I suddenly snapped. I twisted around quickly when they asked if they could have their way with Elirina for a couple of gold for the evening, take turns. A _couple_ of gold. I flared; Fel Magic swirled about me violently, contorting in a spiral towards the men. One tried to get up and strike back, throwing a punch that nearly caught me off guard. I caught his fist in my hands and dug my nails into his knuckles. Pulsating vibes entered his blood stream through the tiny open wounds. He turned ghostly white with fear as he attempted to squirm, only to increase the pain of the Fel Energy. This man's eyes went wild with fear, becoming huge and desperate as the agonizing magic sung through him. The others tried to pull me off, but to their dismay, the spiraling vines of Fel magic whipped at them. The push back caught them off guard, and they began to drunkenly panic.

"She's worth more than that, you sick bastards! She deserves better than you..." I couldn't contain my anger, my abrupt desire to defend her. My eyes turned a faint crimson as I called upon several curses into their systems, "to think... for a couple of gold, bah! You fiends wouldn't know a beautiful lass if she got naked before you. Now..." I picked one of them up by the collar and glared deeply into him. He squirmed in my grasp, begging for me to let go, screaming and stuttering like a toddler.

"Puh...Puh-please, sir... I... I didn't know that..." He whimpered.

"Didn't know, _what the fuck was there to know?!_" With a simple mutter of words, the man was singing in agony, begging for release. I was losing it, lost in rage towards them. As I slowly regained control, I tossed the weeping man away into a barstool. I turned quickly to the others. My voice, now deeper from the lingering demonic, began to flow through me. "Lia ton, neskva uroa... If I were you, I'd keep your mouths shut. There is plenty... zakit qeara... of Fel Magic left, ugh... in me, should you decide to spread little nuisances... xeo ta flaem... of rumors."

In fear for their own selfish existence, they scrambled to their feet and ran out of the inn. As I watched them leave, a heavy sigh escaped my lips. The Fel Magic died off, simmering into the air like a mist, and my voice became normal again. A dull pain in my head lingered, unwilling to fade away. I rubbed my eyes as the realization of it all seeped in. I had just defended her; I had just become a traitor in the eyes of three men, who would most likely spread the word either way. What could be done? I couldn't handle it all, the world was spinning... Spinning, shaking; I was panicking. The dizziness of the exertion it took to use the magic was catching up on me.

"So it's happening to you too?" A soft voice entered into my mind. I removed my hand from my face out of surprise, looking up with my eyes widening. There she was, the elf, standing before me her emerald orbs the same size, with the Voidwalker by her side. I had left it with her, to guard her should any frisky man sneak by, so it could warn me of intruders. Plus, it held the bond in place in my absence. So wherever it moved, she followed. I figured the thing had sensed the large amount of wrath in my body, thus by demonic contract, it had to come to me and defend its master. It seemed like minutes... we just stared at the other, caught in a staring contest. My heart pounded loudly in my chest, couldn't she hear it? So much happening, all at once, too much – but none of it matter to her. And did I really care? I didn't. Not in reality, not when it all came down to it. I didn't care about being called a traitor, being accused of things. I could not control myself sometimes, and what was I going to do? Change the clock? No, I couldn't unfortunately. Instead, I was split in two. Part of me was in terror, because this could mean the schism of my past life, the end of a dull time in my life, and the opening of a new door to my new life. My future. What did it bring, what did it hold? Well obviously the Lady of Light was trying to convince me... and God knows I was beginning to realize it, accept it. Our feet seemed to disobey us, as we both began walking toward the other slowly, only to embrace solemnly seconds later. I squeezed her tightly, my breath on her hair and right ear. She had just bathed, her hair smelled like purple lotus, a heavenly smell... indeed. And all I could do was close my eyes and just calm down. She was safe, Elirina was safe. I didn't allow, no. I wouldn't allow for men to say such things about her. She was already facing enough. I finally could understand this. That teasing her, antagonizing her, it did nothing. None of it made me feel superior, none of it boosted my confidence, it didn't make me happy, nothing. Not like it used to. Something had snapped the moment I saw her, like a line had been crossed, that despite my struggling, was impregnable. I couldn't deny what my destiny was trying to tell me. If I did, _if I continued to,_ live like this... I was going to regret it. We were going to regret it.

I didn't want to worry about the consequences right then and there anymore. I just wanted... to lay down, with her in my arms, and the idea that I wasn't a sellout. That I could resist temptation, that I was beyond its bond. I hated the idea, I always had, of being dependent on alcohol or money to make me feel secure. But it was all I had had after my mother's death. But, now... I felt that, for the first time in years, ignoring the fact that demonic magic was used, I felt human. Truly, human. By agreeing to help the Alliance capture Elirina, by laying my eyes on her that night in Hinterlands, by having that dream, by being haunted by it, Samuel's conversation, Neema's... all of it had derived from a single spark, that now... was raging throughout my system wildly. Gently I picked her up, my right arm holding onto her beneath her calves and my right arm was holding her shoulders up. She lifted her hand to lightly touch my scar, which almost naturally, forced my eyes to close for a moment. Her own eyes were heavy, sleepy most likely. But they held a gentle sadness, as if she could see all my faults before her. I took her back to the room, and laid her down on the bed, my hand silently returning her gesture. I stood there for a moment, still unsure of what to do or say. Did this mean something now? Did she understand finally what our dreams had meant, as I had come to the realization, if not some time ago.

_No, don't ruin it… don't think about it. _I continued to remind myself. I didn't want to spoil whatever bit of positive outcome this evening could have, whatever they would soon be. Looking away, I began to undress my boots, cloak, and robe. I could feel her eyes on me, hopefully she wouldn't get the wrong idea. And thankfully she didn't, as I released the bond from the voidwalker, administering new instructions to it, to guard the door, despite it being closed and locked. Being disturbed, whether alone or not, always ticked me off. So the voidwalker in a sense warded people away. Whatever the person would have to say, as I always believed, could wait for the morning.

Casually I crawled onto the opposite side of the bed, feeling my muscles contract to lying down. Finally a form of relaxation after the long, irritating day. Minutes passed, only until I began to drift off did the Elf begin to stir. Even under the blankets, I guess it was cold (or as I assumed) or whatever, and she moved closer to me, I guess for body heat. Without thinking it seemed, I pulled her into me with my arm around her now. Her head rested on my shoulder, and I tightly squeezed her. I had to face the idea of whether this was real or not.

"God, I'm not going to wake up sometime, and have a serious headache am I?"

She looked up at me, our eyes now catching. Slowly she raised an eyebrow, unsure of what I meant, in the faint flickering candlelight. "Um, I don't understand what you're trying to say."

"This just... can't be real. I can't get my head around all this. It's so confusing, so hard to imagine. You're thinking the same thing. I know you are."

"What... of course no -"

"Please, you're going to have to talk about it sometime. Whether you're embarrassed or not, we're talking about it."

"Talking about what?"_ Playing the stupid card, I see. _In my head, I groaned, she was going to act silly, beat around the bush, obviously. I expected as much from her.

"I know you've had a Lady of Light visiting your dreams, talking to you in riddles, chanting things, and..." I paused, feeling the slight discomfort in the topic. So I decided to play the stupid card as well; I was curious to see if she'd catch on. Because for a fact, I had no idea if she truly dreamed these things. I could have been making a complete idiot of myself right then and there. Thankfully, she seemed to stiffen as she remembered a similar vision herself it seemed. I continued then, "and, well...other things."

Elirina took her time to reply; it appeared that she was thinking, choosing her words wisely. Eventually, she decided and shrugged. "Well... to start, I guess I hardly know anything about you, besides the fact that you're a drunken, selfish, idiotic and indulgent half demon, human thing. I'll refrain from using the term abomination... "

Cynically, she added, "...just because I'm oh-so-kind to you too often."

"How kind of you, my turn to describe you next." I replied, sarcastically, with a grin, "I'm sure you're eager to know what I think of you. But, what do you really, really, want to know about me. Come on, I'll give you a freebie."

"The scars, the burns. I want to know what really happened."

Damn. The rock bottom portion of my life. I closed my eyes, of course. I sighed, rubbing my forehead, then running a hand through my hair before replying. "That's all you can think of? Really? This stupid mark on my face. God, you're not interested in my sex life? Why I'm so damn interested in screwing with people's lives?"

"No. You aren't. Not any more at least, you haven't entirely screwed over my life, as of yet. So that's a flaw in your statement. But your sex life? I'll refrain for now. I know there's a long, painful story behind those burns, and I'm going to find out." It had sounded like she was using this moment as a way to mock me, but reassuringly she took my other hand and pulled it across my chest, holding it tightly to my surprise. "If it becomes too much for you, I'll let you stop. Otherwise, I want to know. You don't see humans walking around with head to toe flesh scars. Look, something happened to you, something snapped according to Neema. She didn't go into details, but apparently you lost your mother. Whether it makes you angry with yourself, or towards others, I won't judge you. I just... want to know."

I groaned, looking down at her again. "You sure? Last chance to ask a better, juicier, sleazier question. Come on, I'll answer _anything_."

"No, I want you to answer the question I asked, if you could be oh so kind."

"Fine, but I'm telling you, it's a boring story."

Silence.

She was waiting, almost patiently for once. I had no choice. But where to start? Where to begin? How do you start the story of a man's downfall? How do you say with words the very idea of agonizing pain, waking up one day to see your entire body's deformed, your mother's dead, with no where to go? You can't. But of course, Elirina, being her usual annoying self, had to fucking ask it.

"You're positive."

"Yes! Get on with it already!"

Was I about to tell this elf my life's story? Was I about to reveal things that I had kept hidden to myself for so long? Things I had repressed for so long? Again, she had to fucking ask it. _Why did I even say she could do that...Fucking heat of the moment, I need to learn to think before I speak._

I sat up, unable to speak about such a topic lazily. It was a serious matter and I appeared to be thinking again to her. I couldn't think of how to start -- how to begin. How do you paint a picture of my life before? How could I? I had an audience waiting, who was direly waiting. This was her chance, her chance to find out more about me. A different side of me. Neema had purposefully planted the seed into the damn elf's brain, however sympathetic Neema or the elf were or wanted to be.

"I guess... as Neema told you, my mother and I used to live in the Hinterlands. We had this quiet cottage near Aries' Peak, not too far, in case we needed supplies or a good meal now and then. I had a dog, a scruffy mutt who had the largest tongue I've ever seen. Still is. Friendliest dog too, unless you're a cat. He loved to mess with cats, bat their tails until they hissed. It was like a fetish or something for him." _Going off track._ I thought, sensing her sudden impatience, "I had a brother, Daniel, a paladin like yourself who served the light in many ways. I never met him, except at his grave. He joined the ranks at 13. He was killed in battle at the age of eighteen, in the Black Temple in the Outlands in the fight against that land's menace, Illidan Stormrage, according to military personnel. He was drafted for the advancing armies of Stormwind into the Outlands four years after I was born, so my memory of him is very faint. My father, apparently, was drafted to fight in Northrend when Daniel was 8. He was gone for one year, only to return for Christmas day, only to leave again. Seven-ish months later, I was born, as I'm sure you were assuming on your own. Daniel is ten years older than I am, and I'm currently twenty-four. If you were curious, I was born on July 17th."

"When Daniel died, mother, for reasons of security and the burial, moved us to Stormwind. I had to give away the dog, unfortunately to Dwarves of Aries' Peak. Haven't seen it since. On arrival at Stormwind, we were informed that the he funeral would take place three days later. I had never seen my mother cry like that, since the news had first been given to us. I couldn't truly cry, if not feel some form of sorrow. I didn't know the man, who was claimed to be my brother. I was meeting him for the first time, and of course I felt awkward. All I could simply do was hold my mother's hand and try to be the man she needed then. He wasn't there for the funeral, my father, Nathaniel J. Archavon, which had upset her a lot more. We settled down for a year in a tiny, uncomfortable inn in the Dwarven District. It took mother some time to earn the money as a barkeep to earn money for a reasonable home in the city. She hated the Dwarven part of town. Too smoky and chaotic for her. She especially hated the sound of a hammer hitting an anvil. Used to drive her insane; she'd flinch violently when she'd hear it. We finally found a home that was cheap and cozy, but better for her. It was on the riverside, next to entrance to the Cathedral square. Unfortunately, it was next to the Stockades. Which, in truth, wasn't as bad. The stone diminishes the sound of the screaming when they torture prisoners. We spent five years there somewhat happily in that house. During these years, I grew up taking care of my mother while learning a profession. I was interested in entering the ranks, however, they wouldn't allow me first of all, claiming that I had to take care of my mother. Which I earnestly tried to do. Instead, I became an apprentice to an engineer. An older man who had spent his life perfecting these goggles. It's kind of silly, they're a big hit now. You might have heard of them, but under a different name. They're "romance goggles", now known as "Gnomish X-Ray goggles. Apparently if you wear them, you can see people naked, or rather, like a x-ray kind of thing. And I'm sure you can guess where I learned everything from… that had to do with perversion, where babies came from, oh the usual. My master was a perverted old man, who had his usual courtesans secretly after I had left the shop, who drunk ale and showed off his gadgets. Mother didn't approve most of the time, but he was the only man who taught it in Stormwind, and I was hell bent on learning the craft. I was fascinated by fireworks, explosives. I loved the moment when I watched the fuse sizzle as it made its way to the dynamite, or whatever it was, that I was using."

"It was my mother's birthday. I had advanced to being able to create my own gizmos and other types of fireworks and explosives to the point that I was nearly able to have my own job, helping my master. If anything, my mother loved fireworks. They dazzled her, especially if my own hand made them. She told me that they made her proud, proud to see her last living son so successful and happy. She was thrilled to see how I had grown up, beyond the troubles of the past and open with a bright future in Engineering, or so she believed."

"She clapped, smiled and cheered at my successful launches, loved the goggles I had made for her (not the x-ray ones, but rather long distance ones, that allowed you to see things far away). I even had given her a mechanical squirrel, which she adored. Mother..." I looked up, pausing then, closing my eyes and visioning her happiness at that moment, when she held the tiny creation in her hands. Her memory was faded, slowly being lost in the sands of time. This began to bring tears to my eyes, and I quickly forced them away. I didn't need the Elf to think I was weak then. "So... I had made a large firework, as a finale you could say, for her. A mixture of her most favorite colors, mixed together to produce a grand scale explosion of a series of sparks, each with a mixture of colors, that would surely delight her. So... I lit the fuse, and off it went. My mother's eyes dazzled in the faint moonlight as she watched the thing go higher and higher, her anticipation climaxing. However, there was a complication as the thing went up. It jerked and twisted violently, I believe it was the pressure of the air pressing too strongly against the tiny melt container I had it all in. It spiraled downward, fizzing and spraying tiny sparks everywhere, until it collided with a building nearby. The impact with the explosion sent us flying. I had been knocked out by the collision."

Elirina was gripping my hand tightly now, she could see the despair in my eyes. Softly, almost muttering, she whispered, ".. You don't have to -"

But I ignored her, and simply continued as if I had not heard her. "I woke up in the Cathedral of Light, my body singing with pain. I screamed, writhed in my bed as I begged for someone to come. There were others by me, others injured as I panicked. Everything was painful. Breathing, blinking my eyes. Each breath I took felt like my last, I was heaving coughing for someone to help. The salt in my tears stung my charred flesh. Not to mention the horrible smell of charred, decaying skin and muscle. Its the worst thing, next to a completely dead body being decomposed. Imagine both combined, that's what the Cathedral of Light smelled like for days, weeks... The things you see in an infirmary, they last. I wasn't the only burn victim... there were others, my mother and master included. I asked about my mother in whimpers, but it was all too busy. Days passed and I finally had been drained off whatever energy I could muster. My thoughts were extremely grim for what positive thing could come out of this. I didn't need them to tell me the verdict of what happened in regards to my mother and master. I could see it on their faces, I could see the remorse towards me and every other victim in the building. But there was also blame in their eyes, whether they tried to hide it or not, it was there. It had been my fault, I had caused such agony. I knew it, but each time I thought about it, I would start to pant and cough up ashes. Days turned to a week as I waited in my bed nearly at the break of death. I couldn't handle the desire to sleep, but sleep was deprived of me. Not when I had nightmares of what had happened to my mother, not when I saw her burning alive before me, not when I saw the city people pointing their fingers at me, calling a mob to come after me, yelling at me, hating me. Every now and then I'm haunted by one of these visions, still."

"It was finally my turn, a week after I had woken up. The woman was kind, gentle and forgiving. She took care of me, personally took care of my wounds, cleaning, disinfecting, and then bandaging them. You see, it took so long for the victims to be taken care of because of two things. At the time, Stormwind had been under siege for two months by the Horde, and two, the war effort tore away most shamans, druids, and priests. She never told me her name. She was simply a mysterious draenai who chanted and sung songs to revive those injured. Had it not been for her, I would have died a day after, from five major infections in both my lungs and eye." I pulled a clump of hair away from my right eye, showing the elf the burn scar and my withered eye, "She was able to grant me regrowth in the nerves there, but the vision is still off some. I can see, but not the peripheral. No one told me about the burns while I was being revived, they simply said that I had received major flesh wounds and damage to my lungs. I didn't find out about the nasty scars a burn leaves behind for about a week later, when the healing process had been completed nearly, and I was able to move around."

I turned to face her, catching her eyes with my own. Elirina examined my face, seeing both sides to me. The smooth flesh of the left and the broken half, the right. She was sitting up now as well, her legs beneath her. Her back was straight as she leaned forward and brushed the flesh with her fingers, as if she were touching it for the first time. At first she flinched, surprised yet again by the feel to it. My eyes closed, and I let her come to grips with what I had said. Before, I had seen a tiny stream fall down her cheek as she listened. She understood as much now, but there was more. The story was not over. "Do you know what's it like, to have people looking at you and nearly screaming at the mere sight?" My hand moved out of her grip as I slowly unbuttoned my tunic, to reveal a scarred, pale chest. Over the area where my heart lay, was a demonic symbol that pulsated a dull green. She gasped, covering her mouth with her hand. "Have people been repulsed by your very _presence_, blaming you for something that in all forms, wasn't truly your fault? Has that ever happened to you?"

Slowly she shook her head, slightly paralyzed by the sight. "I figured as much. You really were right, that night on the ship. I am a monster in appearance. I am an abomination. This isn't natural, none of me is natural! You see this marking," I pointed to the symbol, "it's where my heart used to be. My human one. You see, you Paladins think you know everything about warlocks and necromancers. But the truth is, the only way you can adopt the teachings of demonic magic is to sacrifice half of your heart. This allows for the control and mastery of such demons, without them rising against you. It's always a matter of master – slave, when it comes to warlocks! We're always in control; thus having a portion of the demon in us allows us to always have control of that creature. Specifically, if you were interested, I have a quarter of a Fel Hunter's and Incubus's heart, as well as the human portion. In order for me to control an infernal, imp and voidwalker, other parts of my body were replaced. You see, you think you know, but in reality, you've only brushed the surface. But what's great, is I know everything about you. Paladins are a Warlock's grandest enemy, because you stand for everything we aren't. Justice, vindication, and the pursuit of what is morally right. We as half-human, half demons go against the Light's teachings, that all things are created to be virtuous and holy. We tend to keep our demons close, and our enemies' closer. Though, I will admit to not knowing about the seals. That surprised me."

"B-but, how could someone chose such a path? I know you suffered, but why chose the extreme? Your mother would have wanted you to be happy, to live on."

Again, I ignored her statement as if she had not even said a thing. So I continued on, "The Great Stormwind fire, as it has been renamed, killed 10 people, and injured nearly everyone who lived around the destroyed area, that is of course if you were there at the time. My mother had died of third degree burns in her sleep, hours after they had dragged her body into the hospital. My master was killed instantly by the impact of the explosion, slammed into a stone wall, shattering his skull. The house my mom had slaved over to buy was destroyed, and I refused to live in an orphanage. But before it was even an issue, I was taken to my mother's funeral. My father, this time, was present. We caught glances but I refused to even look at him, until after she was buried. I only being 14 ran after him screaming at him, blaming him as he began to walk away to the harbor. Had we never gone to Stormwind, had Daniel never died, had my father not forced Daniel to join the army, had my father been a craftsman... she _wouldn't_ have died. Don't you see, for years I lived with the idea that it was both my father's and my own fault for her death. Now of course, I understand that it wasn't my father's words that made Daniel join the army, he simply was passionate about his people at such a young age, and wanted to prove it through battle. None of it could be helped."

Again, I paused to let it all seep in for us both.

"But it wasn't your fault! You didn't know that the thing was going to come crashing down! You can't predict the future. Nicholas," caught up in the moment, she turned my head so that I was looking at her, focused. She held my left cheek in place tightly, reassuringly. "...Not everything is as it seems. Just because it happened, doesn't mean you meant for it to. Your intentions were in the right place, you couldn't help if –

"But I know what was wrong! I _knew_ what was wrong! I knew damn well, and I _let_ the thing go off! I was so caught up in my own selfish desire to see it go off, that my pride-bloated head couldn't think straight! _It is, my fault!"_

"But you were also a naïve teenager! You and your mother had the right to feel happy about it, to not worry! It's no ones fault! It isn't your fathers, and most importantly it isn't your own. If you just step back, and look at it all from where I'm standing, you can see it."

I narrowed my eyebrows and shook my head, only to be jostled back into place under her hand. "Now you listen, _shut up! _It isn't your fault. Can't you see how it makes you! You can't change what the hell happened! It happens. Fate works in mysterious ways, things happen for a reason! You of all people seem to be thinking that lately! Look at us! Lady Fate planned this. How can you deny her. You've been on this path all your life; I'm telling you, she does things for a reason. Everything in life has a purpose. The fire was a teaching moment, that not everything lasts forever, but it should be cherished, not wasted. But obviously you didn't learn that, or else you wouldn't have spent ten years getting drunk with women you don't even know! Do you really think your mother wanted you to be this way?! Do you think Neema is happy seeing you this way! God, Nicholas, you have so much going for you! So much ahead of you... So much time left in your life."

With her eyes peering deeply into mine, I began to crumble beneath my feet. The world was spinning, I was losing it. Everything she said was right, all the words meshed together in her fit of trying to make me understand had hit me hard, as if she had punched them into my skull. My eyes watered again, and I meant to rub them away, until she pulled my head into her breast, holding me tightly to her. It was then that I embraced her, gripping her gown tightly as I let go of any restraint I had on my emotions. I simply broke down. For minutes I sobbed into her chest, unable to shake the feeling away. Her heartbeat comforted me, brought me security. I didn't care that she was an Elf anymore, I was just beyond thankful that she could still look at me with the respect that power gave, as well as a kind of admiration to be able to show this side of me. None of it was pity; I didn't need pity. It was racing, her heart. I loved the sound of it pounding against my forehead as I breathed her scent in and out. I drew in a deep breath, and slowly pulled away.

I was speechless. I couldn't think of a thing to say to her then. I had never told my full story to anyone, and I was glad I had saved it for her. Others would have judged me, become confused or misinterpreted my own thoughts... but no, her... She saw it as a large portrayal of my mind and the way I had been shaped over the years. But that was only half of it. There was still a large time gap in between from then and now. I truly didn't want to get into those memories either, for they were of my rock bottom lifestyle, my truly gluttonous life that I led for so long. It was of parties and drinking, sex and violence. I had been drafted to fight, taken to the Arathi Basin against the Forsaken and Orcs of Hammerfall at the age of fifteen, then off to Stormwind again two years later. There, I was granted my title, Knight for my "valiant" courage against the Horde and for defending the lives of so many. I guess that was when my reputation tilted dramatically. It was there, that I began to live a life of doing "under the table" jobs for the Alliance, such as assassinations, the questioning and torturing of prisoners for information, capturing members of the Horde, during the day, and drinking with other members of the militia and fucking a random prostitute at night.

Awhile later, Elirina asked in the silence. "Do you look like him?"

"My father? I guess. My mother had auburn hair and blue eyes. Daniel looks more like a mix of them. I look exactly like my father. Minus... other acquired traits."

She nodded, feeling awkward now. She shrugged her shoulders and looked up again, tidying up her old gown of any wrinkles (which was a dull black, that I found in her backpack the night I had captured her). "I'm guessing it's my turn now."

"If you want to, I won't make you." I replied casually, needing to lay down now.

"My story... isn't as eventful as yours. And sorry, there aren't any hot, juicy sex scenes involved." I eyed her, and she began to laugh, "... well, not entirely. I was born in Eversong. If you don't know where that is, it's above the Plaguelands, beyond Ghostlands. It's a completely differently kind of forest than say, Hinterlands. No, Eversong is magical. I know that sounds completely silly, but trust me it is. The magic venues from old arcanums of arcane magic, sanctums of magic bind the land to a mystical kind of aura about it. My mother, who's still alive, was raised a mage and my father, who was killed in battle, became a paladin. I have an older sister, Anissa, whose one hundred, if not more, times more attractive than me, if you were wondering."

"Oh? You're pretty hard to beat already." I replied, grinning some as her cheeks flushed in the faint light.

"Anyway... she's a jeweler now. She doesn't like combat; rather, she spends her days looking over her own jewel crafting shop, cutting fine gems and stones into jewelry and emblems for nobility. She refuses to produce things for battle, I guess it's not her thing. Father hated that, well, actually, he wanted sons, but well, what can you do?" Elirina paused, pushing a loose strand of hair beyond her long, upright ear. "Anissa isn't much older than me, she's older than you though, by one year. I guess you could say that she gets my mothers "oh so beaming" smile and grace, hence the reason why she was turned off at an early age of the idea of fighting in some battle, getting bloody and covered in mud (if it's raining, I guess?). Well, I bet you'll be surprised to hear this, but most elves that live in the city, are usually having an affair. And voila, my mother and father were both unfaithful. My mother liked the exotic type. If you ever happen to go to Silvermoon City, look for the troll ambassador, that's him... her lover. Father however, was more so interested in concubines at the local harlot house. And what I find horrible, was that they were open with their affair! Anissa didn't mind it, whereas I did. I just... could never stand for the way they treated one another. If they didn't love each other, why bring children into this world? Why even waste money on the ring and marriage!"

"I'm guessing your kind get married just for a reputation. Just like us humans, we do the same thing. We do it so that it looks like we're dignified people, that we're beyond temptation, and that we have the ability to make some form of commitment in life, whether we keep to it or not."

"Exactly! Usually the older elves would gossip about so and so, if you weren't married. It's silly, a waste of time! Thats... why I left Silvermoon at the age of twelve. I couldn't stand the trifle talk about this or that, or so and so's scandalous event, or tomorrow's ball, or any of the gossip! As disgusted as I was by him, my father helped me get into an academy in Undercity to train to become a member of a group called the Blood Knights. Now you see, there are actually three kinds of paladins. There are your kind, the followers and protectors of the Light, Blood Elf paladins, who are dignified warriors who guard the city and those who live there, and then there are Blood Knights, which I'm guessing you are most familiar with of my kind. Blood Knights are sworn to many secrets, things of nobility, my kinds past, to nearly anything you can think of historically, but most of all, we are sworn to protect the nobility and to aide in the help to find a cure to our thirst for... mana."

And at that very moment, I realized how sullen Elirina's eyes were, how exhausted she looked. She had lost a perk to her usual elfish nature. She seemed to be reminded now, that she needed mana. She shook her head in response to my sudden worried look. But I knew definitely what was wrong, I had after all let Chii feed nearly once a day to keep her somewhat subdued. And now, I was beginning to regret it. Each day she seemed to become frailer, more broken, more desperate, more helpless. "I'm…fine... just, a bit drained."

"You aren't fine – look, I'm sorry." I stopped, shocked for a moment. I apologized? I sat up again, pulling her hand to my lips. "Look, you must promise me one thing. In the mean while, until things get straightened out, you and I both have to keep our venom swallowed back, we have to... accept things at this time and place."

"I guess..." She muttered now. She looked less attentive, dazed somewhat.

"I've never done this before... how do you –

"Siphon mana from a demonic creature? It's quite simple. I just put my lips on your –

But my body assumed. I didn't let her finish her sentence as I pulled her head forward roughly taking her lips. Surprised, she squirmed against me. Forcefully I held her in place, not only for myself, but also for her. I needed this connection with her, to feel the surge of light and dark mixing between us, to know yet again that she was concrete, and not an abstract vision in my twisted mind. She soon enough pushed back lightly and innocently, as if she didn't know what I was doing. I knew that the process would be painful as she drained my own mana away, though not a life source, it was still very important to my body working functionally, so I figured, why not make it somewhat pleasurable? As Elirina began to catch on, I pulled her onto my lap, her legs straddling my waist. I was throbbing beneath those pants, direly wanting to have her right then and there. But I swallowed my lust, and let myself enjoy whatever it was she could handle. I was interested myself at how she was planning (because kissing was obviously not the way she siphoned mana, to my dislike) to drain the mana. There were only so many nodes; despite it being a kinky thought at a serious moment, I wanted to dare her to find them all, just to see if she would do it out of innocent naivety. Unfortunately, I didn't say word. I didn't want to ruin the moment, as she moved away and felt down my chest to the demonic symbol. I only caught a glimpse of her eyes, but they were primal, furiously needing her life source.

Again, it's amazing seeing what creatures do when they're desperate.

Abruptly she pushed my body backward onto the bed, my head against a fluffy pillow, and I couldn't help but become excited. I loved the look in her eyes as she lavishly licked her lips. My skin was already tingly, I couldn't help it. Too many other wild nights had started this way in my past, I was eager. The symbol was glowing brightly now, making her grin wickedly. Slowly she leaned over me, starting at my neck. She nipped and tore at the flesh, pulling at my skin like it was leather in between her teeth. I grunted loudly as she continued, nearly spilling my over the edge at moments. _No, control._ I continued to remind myself. Obviously she had found one of several nodes. Specifically the one on my neck was the infernal marking, which was a central node in channeling demonic energy and mana to other parts of my upper body. The Elf would begin chaotically, then, as the blue energy began to surge through her, she seemed to calm for a few seconds. This gave her time to pant and for my own body to recover from waves of pleasure. Her fingers searched for others moving over the burn scars slowly, almost purposefully about my neck as her lips moved downward. My arms, which had been around my sides were inspected for nodes, only to be disappointed as she moved on to my wrist. Thankfully, she perked up again at the smell of fresh mana. She sat up, with her legs around my waist as she pulled my wrist to her lips, only this time she was gentler (despite the fact that she had to bite into the flesh to get the source flowing). She lapped the pure liquid with her tongue until it was nearly dry. Again, she wiped her mouth again, licking her fingers for any and all residue that had been on her parched lips.

Couldn't she see how amazing this all was for me? God, how could any man resist her! If it was her sister that they had their eyes on, by all means! They didn't know what they were missing. But then again, I was different. I was a half being, with both parts. So I had demonic nodes, which allowed her to go on with this, as well as a human side, which was silently whimpering in delight. After she was done, Elirina moved to my chest, to where my heart lay. I wasn't toned extremely, like most human males were. I had some hand to hand combat experience, which had given me a tiny about of "pure muscle" in both my arms and chest. However, I couldn't handle much physical exertion without tapping demonic power, primarily because of the burns. Again, she bent her head down again to bite the area. She ignored the fact that the area was indeed, a burn scar (which made the flesh thin and easy to tear). The Elf suckled away, taking me again to nearly the brink of having no mana as well. She drained me nearly empty, and I suddenly began to relate to the feeling that she experienced after Chii had sucked her leg, or arm or whatever limbs it wanted. I closed my eyes one last time, as I let it all seep in. The sensations of both dull pain and wild excitement slowly simmered, making me grin. When I opened again, she was looking down at me from my right side. In seconds she had recomposed herself, moved off me and was checking to see if I was even still alive.

"Mmm, that was interesting. You should have told me you needed mana badly, I would _love_, to help you with that matter, whenever you need it." I said, laughing charismatically after.

She blushed again, smiling now. "You never asked."

We both laughed, and I realized that for the first time we had actually held a conversation without one of us becoming angry. She began to playfully tease me again, "What a ground breaking moment. You're actually sitting here with me and we're laughing."

"Of course, I owe it to you... I've...never felt more human than I have tonight." At this, I sighed gratefully, allowing my lips to curve into a soft-ish smile, "I have to thank you for that. For forcing me to talk about it. I haven't found a person who wasn't there to judge, or make assumptions about me. Rather, you listened... and were open with me about your own life. Elirina, it just makes me feel horrible. It really does. You have such a lovely side to you, I can't believe that Lady Fate thinks we're made for each other. There... must be a man out there, somewhere, who adores you, who you're in love with already. There has to be. I can't be your last hope. "

She was turning a brighter shade of red with every word I spoke. She looked one hundred times better, also. She was alert now, attentive and awake. Her body had become more full, plump and healthy again. Her skin also had its usual glow about her. And only in a matter of minutes! I was shocked by such rejuvenation; not even my own life taps were as regenerative. Slowly she shook her head. "Not exactly... I'm not in love with him."

"Oh, I'm curious, tell me about it." I said, truly interested.

"He's a brilliant fighter; strong, brave, courageous, handsome. But he isn't cordial, he isn't charming. He's not the kind of man who I've always dreamed of having feelings for... I guess you could say I'm a hopeless romantic, hence the reason why, as you certainly know... don't have much "experience". I'm too picky."

"You're just looking for the man that you've truly dreamed of. A knight in shining armor, who'll rescue you! But of course, didn't I tell you. I'm a Knight. Knight Nicholas, at your side, m'lady."

She blinked and looked away, trying to suppress another blush. "...Someone who I want to spend my life with. Someone whom I can sit down with, on a blanket in the middle of no where, and just stare at the sky and think, while holding their hand. Someone who loves me for who I am, not for beauty or present or past reputation. I don't want to be used like a trophy, a golden jewel to the man I secretly hate. Unfortunately, I'm worried that my mother is going to force me to marry him... I just hate it! I don't love him," she folded her arms across her chest, rubbing her slightly shivering shoulders. "Plus, I hated how my parents cheated on each other, even with the other knowing! I sometimes just really despise my mother! He's just not right in my eyes... and I've gotten the vibe oh too many times, that he's just like every other gossip spreading, cocubine loving elf, who thinks he's the best there is, who thinks he can steal a woman's heart with a glance. Love isn't like that... its beyond looks."

Thoughtfully, I stared at her. She was indeed, as hopeless as I used to be in the past. Parts of that side remained, but they were scattered and hidden beneath the barrels of alcohol and material things that kept me preoccupied. I looked down, she had so much going for her as well. I... couldn't hold her down, I had to let her go. Possibly she could forgive me, for the wrongs I had committed, if I just made one thing right in the world. "Well," I began, "thankfully for you, you're stuck with me until Ratchet. I, who has seen the lovely inside of the Stockades, am not too jazzed up about being on trail for treason for defending you."

She blinked again, narrowing her eyebrows.

"I don't follow..."

"Don't play the stupid card now, it doesn't flatter you. I'm letting you free once we hit Ratchet."

"But... I thought, gold, women, alcohol..."

"There are other ways to earn such a living."

"But, where will you go? If you can't go to Stormwind, you obviously can't go to any other of your faction's cities."

"I was thinking maybe Shattrath. I've been there once in my life, when I was twelve. Transporter my master had made had malfunctioned, so it sent me to Shattrath, which I didn't know at the time, instead of the way station in the other room... It's kind of neutral territory. I believe there were several refugees there. I'm sure they get plenty of treasonous people looking for a cozy place to stay. The only bad part is there is going to be a freaked out military official in Stormwind when they hear of this news. There was a... erm, a demonic contract created that obliged me to even come after you in the first place. Created by me, of course with my dear Succubus' help."

She laughed for a moment, only to realize that my attitude had turned solemn and sleepy. I was trying to so hard not to fall asleep, I didn't want it all to end, for the night to die off. My heart was stumbling in my chest, heavy with regret suddenly. Elirina softly began to spoke up again, "So... that's it, then?"

"I guess. Why?"

"Oh, nothing..." she paused again. "Do you ever plan on taking up Engineering again?"

"I might. But I probably will try out this type called Gnomish Engineering, apparently it's less... dramatically explosive. Plus, I'd love to make some of those more, advanced goggles."

"You mean the X-Ray ones."

"A guy can dream," I said, shrugging, as I folded my arms behind my head. A sting of unhappiness swallowed up what little optimism I had created in the last few hours. My heart hung heavy, as Elirina finally laid down beside me, noticing that I was either asleep or too tired to keep talking. Of course, she chose to torture me more, with the idea that I was asleep. She lifted her lips to kiss my forehead. I froze, clenching my fists until they turned blank white. "Thank you." She whispered in my ear, only to slouch down again. Soon enough, she was asleep as well. With the candlelight still flickering in the gentle breeze of the tiny room of the inn, due to a window being open, I watched her for a moment. Could I really let her go? How could I? Not when I had seen a future far too bright, far too enjoyable than I could ever imagine... with her. She saw it too! How could she deny it?! But... I belonged with the wretched demons that I conversed with and controlled.

I moved a stray strand of hair from her face as I simply just stared at her. Mixed emotions welled in my stomach that made me feel sick, dizzy. Quietly, I groaned and sat up, getting out of bed and moving to the window for fresh air. I closed my eyes and let the cool breeze come over me and run through my hair.

What did I really think was going to happen once we hit Ratchet? That I was just going to run away with her, and convince her that I could be the man of her dreams? A man whom she could love in return? Was I just going to go with her Orgrimmar, and magically be excepted by her? Despite what I had done to her, how I treated her before nights such as these? Did I really actually think that could happen? Did I love her, deep down? Did hate somehow deviate from its usual course thanks to outside sources?

Of course not; it had been a stupid thought in the first place.

I folded my arms against the windowsill and looked out at the harbor. With the nearly full moon shining high, I sighed heavily, as my hearth lurched some, as I forced myself to admit it. Biting my lip, I knew that I did. I loved her. Everything about it was off, wrong, not right, sick and messed up. But... well, I had found a new dream to inspire me. Lady Fate, as the dear elf had said, worked in mysterious ways. And this, by all means, was extremely confusing. But part of me couldn't grasp the idea... that she could love me. Not after what I had put her through.

"A guy can indeed dream." I said quietly to myself, as a wave of unhappiness fell upon me again.

* * *

**A/N: **Okay, not really a lemon... So sorry if you were looking forward to that. I did say it was a sorta kinda, not really kind of lemon. I guess you could say it was more like fondling, on Eli's mindlessly hungry behalf.

Sorry if I messed up the purposes of a Blood Knight. I really don't get into lore entirely (its a guideline, _trust me! _:3 ). If you have a better explanation, or a website I could use that explains WoW lore better than the stupid manual, then please, I would LOVE to have it.

I really do hope this was an improvement from the last, which was a bit more so a filler chapter to get things moving. This chapter, I definitely hope was all killer no filler!

If you have any ideas or would like clarification on something, please feel free to tell/ask me, in game (see profile) or on here.

This chapter was, not intentionally inspired by the song "18th Floor Balcony" by Blue October. If you listen to it, parts kind of coincide with my story thus far.

Don't be surprised if more song/chapters arise from me.


	7. The Nostalgia Part III

Chapter 4

Part Three of the Nostalgia

You Make Me Smile

_**Disclaimer:**__ I do not own Warcraft, or any NPCs or graphical places mentioned. The plot line and characters are mine, however._

I was in a haze throughout the next morning in the murky town of Menethil. Directly in the marshlands, it was quite dull in both beauty and horrid, with a putrid smell of both sea water and swamp air. Elirina was at my side as we walked through the crowds of people who had gathered to see the "heathen" leave. Again, the insults flew, the cries of anger and hatred were thrown in her face. She stayed close to me, not looking at them in the eyes. Ignoring them was the best thing to do, in the midst of it. There would be no other choice; but we both knew that they were fools, ignorant, and blind.

Along the way however, I was stopped by a haggard old woman who pushed her way through the crowd to me. She grabbed onto me, pulling me towards her, away from Eli. I struggled and pulled her off, confused by what she wanted. However, the woman was persistent. She was telling me things, things I couldn't understand in all the noise, but she kept pointing to some cup. Although I was able to break off from her for a few moments, she roughly pulled me into an alley.

"Seriously? What do you want, I really have to get going." I ordered, entirely irritated by her actions. I tried to not get angry, but I had lost Eli in the area and I had to find her... before someone else did.

"Aye, yes." She pointed to the cup in her hands, lifting it to my eye level. "I've seen you before, warlock, in a vision. You're fate is about to be tested. It's in the leaves, as well."

"What..." I looked at the broken leaves in the cup, entirely unsure of what she was talking about. I had never paid much attention to fortunes or visions. But here I was. Believing in the riddles of a Lady of Light. "I don't understand what you mean."

"You've been visited by a mysterious woman in your dreams, in regards to the elf you were with."

I stiffened up, looking away from her, "... I don't know what you're talking about you."

"You're unsure of things still, aren't you? You don't know if this is blasphemy or not?"

I blinked, frozen. How did this woman know of these things? _How did she know..._ I gulped, shaking my head some, "I... I don't know. I don't believe that it's possible -"

"You aren't seeing things from my eyes. You know you've changed. You know its happening. You're realizing it slowly, and there is nothing you can do. But my purpose is to warn you. You must stay strong, you mustn't let it crumble. You've seen the future. Do not doubt its path in a way that you change its true course."

"But, I can't..." I sighed, running a hand through my hair,_ "_You don't get it. This is all wrong, this isn't meant to be. You have it wrong, I'm not a hero, I'm not the man... that she could love."

"In time."

I stared at the elderly woman, dumbfounded. What was I supposed to do? Just believe her? Of course not. She was probably... But I couldn't explain it with a definite definition. There was no way, no way that she could see this. I couldn't just dive into such a naïve idea. I had never been that kind of person, not since my mother's death. I shook my head again, pushing such a stupid idea out of my mind. I pushed away from the woman, and walked off in search of Eli, "I'm not a fool."

But I failed to hear the woman mutter her last bit of advice, as she watched me leave.

* * *

Of course, there had to be a single negative out of this entire matter. A new nuisance arrived in the midst of our stay in Menethil. Knight Lieutenant Aaron Anders, a human paladin who had an attitude that most chose to keep pleasant. Anders was the kind of man you had to avoid, or else two things could happen. One, he'd start to brag about himself for hours on end, or two, he'd glare daggers at you for no apparent reason. Anders, a somewhat stout man in his mid 40s who was beginning to bald (but tried to believe it didn't matter him, when clearly, it caused him to have self-esteem issues). He was your usual stuck up man, who couldn't understand when too much, was _too much_. A paladin of his stature was like many others, of our faction. Arrogant, selfish and cocksure, almost if not always, all the time. There was only one immediate positive from his presence. At the time of our arrival to Menethil to the time we actually were high on the seas, Anders was the only possible candidate to report my treason to in the tiny harbor village. Since the man was gone from the area, the townspeople who had witnessed my defending of the elf would have to find another person to tell. This bought me some time, in my own planning of escape to Shattrath.

Shattrath... I had to find a quick and nearly undetected way to the city of the Naaru, the Scryers, and the Aldor, as well as the many refugees and scandalous men and women of Outlands and continental Azeroth. I really was cautious while on the ship because of the paladin's aura about him. Anders would see me, and stare as if he knew what I was thinking at times. I believe he caught me staring once at her, in a daze, and his expression showed that he was alarmed or confused. He seemed like the man who wouldn't understand, who couldn't comprehend the matter, but would rather condemn it instantly. Most paladins of the Alliance felt that way, and Anders was not any different. Rather, he was more of a hypocrite. He preached to us about respecting the Light, and those in charge, looking at our faults and pointing them out in our face. He scowled in rage at Elirina's presence. She was a thorn in his side, a prickle in his thoughts. Her perversion of the Light disgusted him, her thirst for mana was horrid, and he couldn't stand seeing her. He was like the others; insulting and throwing remarks back and forth, as if she didn't understand Common herself. In turn, she would snicker sometimes, and yell back in Common as well. This would always throw him off, stopping him in his tracks. Elirina's attitude towards him was beyond hatred. If it weren't for my magical bond, the Elf would have lunged at him, and a fight would have broken out on the ship. Duncan frowned upon the tension, however there was little he could do against a high ranked member of the military. Alas, I couldn't do anything either. However, there were ways to work around it.

At night, Allen, Duncan and I would get Anders drunk to the bone, with the intention that we all were under it. Anders was easy to put down and sedate indirectly; play some cards, bring out the drinks – I was quite surprised he didn't catch whiff of what we were doing to him, Allen and I. One particular evening, Allen and I knocked out the Knight Lieutenant and sent him away to his cabin, allowing the rest of the evening to be peaceful without his plight. So we decided to play cards. All of us. I went to my cabin, and asked Elirina if she wanted to play. She simply shrugged her shoulders, unable to reply; but I was already dragging her out of the room towards the mess hall where the others were. Her footsteps were the only noise that filled the air as she followed, my hand in hers as we winded the hall ways to the room where the others were waiting. I felt my body singe and sear as her skin clung to mine tightly. _Get ahold of yourself, you fool_, I reminded myself. Upon opening the door, we were greeted by Elysia and Duncan's smiles as well as Allen's glance. Eli returned a timid smile as I grabbed a stool for her to sit on at the tiny table.

"So what'll it be then, hm?" I asked her, only to have her turn and eye me oddly.

"Of what?"

"To drink, what would you like to drink?" I clearly asked her, chuckling.

"Oh, uh... Anything would be fine..."

She was nervous for some peculiar reason, as if she were being watched our kept under a tight leash. I stared at her for a moment and curled my smile into a grin. Quickly I grabbed a glass off the counter closest to me, as well as a bottle of rum. I poured everyone a glass, sliding it to each of them across the table. Elirina took it, peering at it, unsure of whether or not to drink it. She sniffed it, only to have her nose crinkle at the bitter scent. She glanced at me, only to shrug and drink the glass all in one gulp. Seconds after, she coughed roughly, gagging at the sharp taste. I couldn't help but laugh, patting her on the back. I figured that it was her first time drinking alcohol due to her reaction. She pushed the glass aside and tried to regain her composure.

"God, how could you_ live_ with drinking that stuff for so long?"

"Oh, eventually you get used to it, am I right, Duncan?"

Duncan raised his glass with a wide grin, "Aye, Nicholas. Ale is just something... ya have to get used to at first, or some people completely reject it."

I lifted her glass again and asked if she wanted another. She hesitated, but nodded her head slowly, seeing it now as a challenge by me. I poured the liquid into it, handed it to her and carefully watched her drink it all up in only a few seconds. She twinged a bit, but for the most part, the sting had fallen away. Elysia soon turned our attention away from alcohol to a stack of cards that she placed upon the table.

"Alright, Eli, have you ever played with these cards before?"

"If they're Darkmoon Cards, I've seen others play the game before, it looked simple enough. Though, I don't think it was the same. The person I saw was reading the cards, such as in a tarot reading sort of way. I'm sure you've heard of Sayge the fortune telling gnoll."

The others shrugged as Elysia began to deal the cards. Throughout the first few "demo" rounds, we taught the elf the basics of playing the real way, and soon enough she caught on. The liquor poured freely, laughs and jokes filled the swollen air, and merriment engulfed the ship entirely as a whole. I had never felt so frivolous, so careless in ages it seemed. Allen was a mastermind at the game; his more "social" side appeared as he openly flirted with Elysia, who would innocently blush and refuse alcohol that came her way. On the contrary, Elirina had completely loosened up. She was tipsy and often would she begin to wildly giggle or toss her head back randomly, as she stared at me with glossy eyes that seemed to question me. Occasionally would she blink and pause in the wake of a moment, just thinking, with her hands folded neatly at the table, until reality seeped back in. Either way, the elf won off and on, giggling playfully at her success. I couldn't believe how easily she had tipped over the edge, well rather, how a simple drink could turn someone... into their complete opposite. She had obviously kept to her oh-so-holy ties, and had never, assuming of course, been as drunk as she was now.

Strudels were provided by Elysia, delicious and welcoming (as Allen was now describing her, in his own tipsy state). I was excited by the evening, to be honest. Whether or not Anders was there bothered none of us, the air was lively and awake with senseless absurdity. As we played, I listened to the others talk of times in the past, reminiscing a world that was unknown to me. I'd join in their laughter, focusing mainly on the blurred times that Elirina described. It was weird. Her mind fell back and forth on the sane and nearly crazy scale. But then again, I had never truly analyzed a person in such a position. It all made me feel slightly embarrassed, for had I been as stupid as her? Did my words slur when I was under it? Probably not, for my tolerance for it was different than hers. Elirina and Allen were just victims to it.

We played until the night waned on and we all became tired. Elysia wished us all a good night, as she walked back to her quarters, dragging Allen along sluggishly. Allen was trying to fondle with Elysia, who in turn froze his hands in place with frost magic. It made Duncan form a wide grin on his face, as he turned to bid us both a good evening, and for me to take care of the drunken elf. However, the captain of the ship could see it as we both paused in silence. Duncan was a man with great insight, despite his crude tongue or mannerisms. I was fond of such an ability – to see beyond a person's shell, and into the crevasses of a man's heart, and where it lay. I nodded, and carried a lethargic Elirina back to our cabin, unable to shake the ideas that and fled back to my mind in seconds. My conversation with Samuel, the fortune teller's remarks, the evening in Menethil, it all skewed my thoughts and sent me in despair. I couldn't grasp the very idea that it could happen, for it seemed like something too far beyond my reach. Once at the door, I put Eli on her feet, and instantly she wrapped her arms around me, giggling. With a wide grin, she began to curl my dark hair between her fingers as her lips moved to my ear. "Nicholas..."

My body heated up wildly, as she pushed me back against the wall of the door to our cabin. She moved closer, decreasing the amount of space between us. "Come now, _Nicholasss_...I know you've wanted me. It'ssh always been there. Just... _let go_."

And how I wanted nothing more to just close my eyes, grasp her in my arms, and let her go as far as she desired. Anything, anything she wanted. But of course, she was just drunk. She didn't really want me; she was just lost in a blurred world, a place that included someone that I wasn't. Elirina pushed hard against me, now kissing my lips roughly, running her hands through my hair. But it happened, I grabbed her neck and returned her gesture, pulling her closer. She moaned, heaving now against my chest. Her hands began to unbutton my shirt, opening my tunic, revealing the scared flesh. Once she touched the demonic seal, I jolted back to reality, and squirmed to get out of her grasp.

"Eli, stop this – I know you're just drunk, this isn't what you want."

She pouted, folding her arms. "Nicholas... hic! Come on... be reasonable... You, I _know_ you want to!" Woozily, she slumped against a nearby wall of the ship, and fell into a spontaneous spur of laughter. I took this opportunity, to open the door and pull her inside before the others woke up.

"Listen, I'm not going to. You're drunk, you need rest."

She frowned, confused. "You're ssho unpredictable. Firsst you want me. Now you don't. I don't understand you!... hic!"

"I told you, I won't."

Angrily, she slapped me across the face. "You jerk! ..." She stumbled back, rubbing her forehead, muttering things I couldn't comprehend, but I knew they weren't positive things. I sighed, and I chose to ignore her behavior. I pulled her to the bed laying her down against the fluffy sheets. Elirina groaned, cursing more in Thalassian.

"Elirina, you're going to feel horrible tomorrow, you don't want it any worse tomorrow than its going to be."

"But..." She leaned against me, nuzzling her face in the burrow of my neck. "It'll be tonsss of fun."

I hesitated, staring at her. I couldn't.

"_No_, Eli." I spoke softly, frowning. Elirina moved off, broken in a way. I knew it was just the heat of the moment, that it was just the alcohol, messing with her judgment. And I was relived that she had come to understand this.

"I'm sorry, Nicholas." She spoke softly, her voice now ringing in my ears, its tone silently torturing me now. I was already contradicting everything that was happening, confused with only slight awareness. _Don't forget_, I continued to remind myself, _She'll be gone soon enough_. But I already knew this. How in the hell was I supposed to let her go. How could I let the one thing that I had fallen in love with, out of my grasp. My withered soul was breaking in each moment that I imagined the idea of not seeing her, not seeing her angry at me, not seeing her laugh, smile. But what would we do, if things changed? If I convinced her that I was right for her, where would we go? Shattrath? I doubted she wanted to live there, in a dark, uncertain land filled with strife and conflict. Hardly few went there anyways. It was bad enough that it was full of refugees... but it wasn't the place for her. Not when she had dreams, dreams that I couldn't impair.

No, I could never put her in that situation, not when she had so much going for her. I couldn't ruin her only chance for happiness after this. Not when she meant so much more to me, than I'm sure she realized. She had passion for life, which I had discovered when things became better between us. In some way, she could see the man in me, beyond the demons and runes. She could see that there was more than the past, more than my appearance. But it had taken so long for her to see just that.

Either way, none of it meant anything. The night ended, as silence hung heavily in the air, as I crawled into bed beside her, exhausted myself from the events of the evening. She had fallen asleep awhile ago, nuzzling up to my body for warmth. I couldn't help but pull her close and stroke her hair. Soon enough, her rhythmic breathing calmed me until I had fallen asleep entirely.

The seas were finally gentle and smooth – the ship hardly rocked. This meant more peaceful sleep for myself, which meant more time dreaming, and more frequent visits from the Lady of Light. The visions were broken, blurred in the midst of a looming chaos. Whatever it all meant, I could not pass it over. Things such as this were mere taunts by my conscience, for I couldn't handle seeing Elirina in my dreams, it was just too much. Too much, too much that I couldn't wrap my head around.

None of it made sense and things only became worse on the course of the trip to Ratchet.

* * *

Days passed while in the Great Sea. We passed by tiny islands, too small to inhabit people or animals, other than birds or crustaceans. During the day, Eli and I walked on the deck, watching the gentle and harmless clouds pass by. Of course, I was only able to take her out only if Anders was preoccupied in his room, talking with someone else below deck, or if he was drunk.

The night after Eli had been drunk was hard on both of us. She was plagued by a massive headache, a sore stomach, and by Anders mere existence. They were still at it, even with the rare encounters. Any time they saw each other, the sparks flew, creating a heavy tension in any room that both of them were present in. But beyond that, Elirina had been appreciative of my taking care of her. Although she was a bit stubborn, she mostly allowed me to take care of her. I was quite surprised that she hadn't thrown up the night before, for she had been entirely wasted. I had given her small meals over the course of two days, as she got over being sick. The sight of liquids made her sick to her stomach, nearly causing her to throw up. All in all, she was bedridden during these days. But in return, I would lay next to her, rub her head, get her a cold compress, or hold her hand, telling her that she would be fine eventually. We would talk during these moments and I finally heard her complete story of her life, up to the point when I had captured her. Overall, it was a timid kind of comfort from me. She didn't take much from it, seeing it as pity or guilt, rather than an act of shy affection from myself. This had disheartened me at first, putting me into a slump, but quickly it passed.

By the time she was healthy again, we were a week away from making it to Ratchet. The entire portion of this trip was much smoother and calmer, without wild winds or raging tempests. If anything, there were a few rain clouds that unfortunately barely dropped any rain. Besides this, the weather was beautiful, which made Elirina uneasy, angsty, and generally unhappy, because she enjoyed being outside. She hated how Anders could go outside, be free, and bathe in _her _sun rays, as she said. Duncan and I, by any means, wanted to do away with him. At times, I was so close to cursing his very flesh with spells that could burn him to pieces, or send him into utter turmoil. Duncan especially hated being bossed around, and it made him a grouchy person to be around. He moped around the ship, commanding his crew to do this or that, but his usual spark in his step had faded temporarily. He was quick to anger or harsh words, that most of the time, got him in trouble. Everything about Anders left us all in a sour mood. Elysia, of course, tried to keep us in the right head, and made sure that we didn't do anything stupid. Allen was indifferent; he had never paid much attention to the man, and his opinion was that the guy was just an idiot. Instead, he would just sit there, sip his ale, and watch Duncan and I grumble to ourselves in regards to Anders.

But during the times inside the cabin, I usually talked to Elirina. She began to teach me Thalassian, but only the dialect. According to her, the written version was extremely difficult in comparison to the spoken language. Overall, it was a beautiful language, and hearing her speak to me put me in trance, usually. It was elegant, flowing and reminded me of the Night Elf language. However, words had several meanings or ways that you could pronounce them, which made things harder to understand. She would read to me, with books that she had been carrying in her bag the night I had captured her. She read to me often, and I began to comprehend and differentiate certain terms, contexts, and tones that the language held. This happened usually at night, where I could relax after a stressful day of dealing with Anders. The gentle chime of her native Sin'dorei tongue made me feel at peace. Her voice in Common had never done this to me, for it had lost underlying qualities that made her even more intriguing, puzzling, and still mysterious to me. It suited her.

On the night of the evening before the ship was supposedly going to arrive, she was reading to me a fairy tale that had been in one of her books. It was about a young elven girl with golden locks and green eyes who was walking home to Dalaran, from Silverpine Forest. Along the way, she was confronted by a handsome man upon an undead horse. Frightened by the cloaked figure and the ghoulish horse, she screamed and tried to run. The man cursed her flesh, putting the woman into a slumber. When she awoke, she was in a large castle in an ornately garnished room. In a simple state of panic, the elf tried to escape, running to the window in hopes of escape. To her dismay, the balcony was too high up. The elf sensed a strange aura about the castle, making her uneasy. Quickly she tried the large stone doors...

But I couldn't help but daze off as she read, unable to focus my attention. I was staring at the ceiling, thinking about things that were beyond the confines of the ship. She continued, however, not noticing my my hollow state. On that evening, I found that I didn't care for an elf who had been kidnapped by a strange man. I didn't care much about the story at hand. My heart was low, empty and unsure about the future. Tomorrow was the last day. The last evening before I let her go, as I promised. But nothing had progressed since that evening in Menethil. I was too big of a coward to say a thing to her, to tell her what was really going on beneath my skin as I stared longingly at her during our evening lingual sessions. It all tore at my inner core, breaking down so many barriers that had at one time, been the very source of my self destruction. I wanted nothing more than to reach out to Elirina and just confess it all to her, but what was the point? She didn't want the misery of not living her own dreams. I couldn't put her in that position. But as I laid in the bed, I closed my eyes angrily and gripped the bed sheets. I desired nothing more than having her be my redemption, for it all to magically descend upon me, and in seconds, I'd become a new person... right before her eyes. A person whom she could love.

But on this fine Spring evening, on a course directly to Ratchet, I could only gaze at her as she read. I watched carefully as her lips would move with the language, flowing and harmonious. Her eyes were brighter than usual, her cheeks weren't sullen already from the deprivation of mana, she was full, alive, awake – Elirina was more beautiful and radiant than I had seen since the evening in the Hinterlands. Emotions were flowing through my veins like wildfire, aches, looming tendencies. Things were just barely unraveling, but here I was... letting it all happen. Though, I guess I couldn't control most of it.

Eli was still reading by the time I learned how to move again. She had come to the climax of her story, where the two characters had come to express their love for each other, which apparently had built up over the course of the story that I hadn't been paying attention to. I sat up, leaning against my bent elbow. She continued onwards however, unmoved by my movement. I could see it in her face, that she was wrapped up in the story. And I had to pause again, to take in this factor. The elf had a wondrous imagination, a heart that longed for things of romance, bravery, and in the end, a happy ending. For years, I had lived with the notion that there was simply no such thing. But then here I was, years later, wanting to be the one that could make it all come alive for her. I listened to her read now. The man from earlier apparently had been injured severely in battle over the elf against those in Dalaran, who had found her with a werewolf (whom the man really was by night). He was weak, helpless, and she was heartbroken and weary.

"The elf clasped his hand tightly, leaned over his chest and sobbed, unable to let him go. As she watched his eyes close in pain, she muttered, '_I love you_,... please, I need you! Don't, don't leave me.'"

My eyes widened as she read the prose, and now she was looking at me, finally noticing my expression. However, all I had heard was "I love you" from her. My mind screeched to a sudden halt and froze. I cupped her chin in my hand, pulling her closer. She blinked and I could hear her heart racing.

"Eli..."

She didn't reply. For seconds we sat there, lost in a trance for moments. I couldn't think rationally, it all was spinning, the world, my thoughts, contorting feelings. But then it happened. I broke free of rationality and dived head first into my heart's wishes. I had to feel her against me, feel her breath against my lips, feel her blood pound in her veins, feel her rise in ecstasy, feel her in a desperate last attempt to making her mine.

Her body stiffened sharply when my lips crashed down upon her. I wanted nothing more for her to eagerly return my advances, to be able to openly accept me. Could there ever be a moment in time, where she would just let it all go? Could she forget the world and indulge herself? Could she think only of me, for just a moment?

I would have never known, until pressure was returned and the sensation of arms slowly wrapping around my neck shook me. She was not drunk. She wasn't being seduced. She wasn't under a spell. Elirina was truly reciprocating my gesture. Heat swirled in my stomach as I pinned her down against the bed, deepening our kiss. Her breath hitched, her fingers ran through my hair and my heart was beating rampantly in my chest. She tugged at my hair gently, caressing my skull with her fingertips. For a single moment she pulled away, looking at me directly. She didn't hesitate when she nodded, never breaking our eye contact.

It all felt right in my opinion. The way she was perfectly molded for me, eager to see what was next in this new experience for her. Thoughts raced through my mind rapidly as my kisses trailed her jawbone, down her neck over two seals. I nibbled at the sensitive flesh, nipping it lightly or sometimes biting into her skin. Hearing her whimper caused my adrenaline to increase significantly, moving to another level. Again, I moved away and caressed her cheek, as she leaned her face into my palm. I curled a strand of her hair between my fingers, tickling her left ear a bit as well.

"..Eli." I breathlessly whispered into her ear, my lips kissing the lope softly. A sigh escaped her lips and she moved her hands down to my chest, unbuttoning the pale white shirt I wore in place of my tunic, until my scarred flesh was exposed. She tossed the shirt aside, moving instantly to the demonic marking over my heart. Her fingers turned a pale white as her body tried to naturally cleanse the evil presence laying there. To her usual dismay, nothing changed. I was still half of a demon, there was nothing she could do. However, for me, nothing other than a surge of a little revitalization ran through me. The tempo increased dramatically from there. I pulled her body into my lap where our lips vigorously collided, until a few seconds later, where I became tender. She disliked the teasing and in response, continuously called upon holy magic into my body.

I pulled off her slender azure blue gown, tossing it aside to the ground beside the bed. She was naked underneath that gown, and it made me grin, realizing that she was so eager for me to continue. Thus, I continued to torture her, leaving my fingers to twirl around her shapely bosom. I stared at her full breasts, taut and eager for me. She blushed, looking away from me. But I remind her that it's okay to be afraid, for I know that it's her first time in this situation with another man. Thus, I took my time, thumbing each, one at a time. She bit her lip, arching her back again to me, the sensation almost too much for her to bear. It made me chuckle, seeing her modest smile. In a silent plea, she kissed my scars down my cheek. I captured her mouth again, roughly and fiercely now. We made love that evening on the ship, passionately and effortlessly as we melted into one. We merged and split from one creature into two, twisting and spinning in the webs of what was becoming our love for one another. We were united and I knew that this was meant to be. I knew that this had to have happened, that it was something that we knew was right. I slid off afterwards, pulling her closer, so that her head laid against my chest. She nuzzled into my arms, her hand taking mine. Elirina was panting for minutes after, trying to regain some form of strength. Gently, I stroked her hair and I moved my lips to her ear, only to whisper, "I love you, Elirina."

I had no idea if she could hear me, if she was awake, or if she knew what had just happened. But my heart was already lurching despite the lingering happiness it also held. Tomorrow the ship would arrive in Ratchet, and that would most likely be it. Lady Fate had fulfilled only part of her wishes, for it was true, for I had meant every single word I had spoken. But for just one moment, I smiled, and let it all sink in.


	8. Let it Go

**Chapter 5**

_**Disclaimer**:_ I do not own Warcraft, I only own my characters.

[**Edit** : Fixed a typo or two and I had a name wrong :/.]

_Let It Go_

I had never slept as peacefully as I had that evening. As I woke up, my lips curled into a smile, my hand stroking the soft head leaning against my shoulder. I felt warm sunlight on my face its gentle rays beaming from the open window. Salty air twinged my nose, coarse and sharp as I yawned and rose from the bed. I pulled on my trousers, moving to look outside. We were reaching Ratchet, for I could see the busy streets and merchants bustling about in the early morning. Goblins patrolled the market area, guarding the seaport from hooligans and thieves. They were the peace keepers of a neutral area in the Barrens.

The ship still had a ways to go, until docking. We were near the Echo Isles, which was Darkspear Troll territory according to Elirina. The tropical land was beautiful against the sunbeams. From behind, I heard the elf yawn, shortly followed by a gasp. Realization. I turned with a wide grin on my face as I walked back to her side of the bed, where she sat with the sheets covering her. She was sitting up in the bed, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. I sat beside her, moving her hand away so that I could cup her chin.

"Good morning."

She shook her head and pulled back, muttering things in a panicked tone. The elf was trembling unable to look at me in the eyes. And this made my heart sink. Was she ashamed of herself? Couldn't she agree, that there was something in this? Didn't she enjoy our lovemaking? I stared at Elirina waiting for a reply from her, needing some kind of response. I gave her a few moments, until I stood up.

I sighed, "Listen... Eli... I know that things got carried away last night –

But she interrupted me hurriedly and I could see her eyes now. "No, don't say anything, don't leave. Just... stay here," her hand grabbed my own out of fear, pulling me back to her. She pulled me into her so that I was leaning over her, my face inches from hers. I lowered my lips to catch her mouth, glad that she was returning my gesture. The kiss was kept soft and smooth, unrushed. Her chest heaved beneath the blankets when I pulled away slowly, taking my time. Lost in the others gaze, I lifted her up into my arms and cradled her. Elirina nuzzled into the hollow of my neck, exhaling lightly. We sat there in silence, simply enjoying the others presence until a hasty knock at our door. The voidwalker sent an image to my mind; a picture of Duncan outside the cabin door impatiently waiting. Quickly I put the elf on her feet, as Duncan's voice spoke from the other side.

"Nicholas, open the door!" Other voices filled the air that sounded like Allen and Elysia.

"Has Ander's discovered the plan?" I called out.

"Don't be a fucken' idiot, we all could hear yer both last night. These walls are wooden, na' stone!"

I moved to gather Eli's armor, as she bashfully tried to cover her naked self, unable to hold back a grin. I couldn't help but be proud of my own accomplishment, pushing an elf such as her over the edge, consuming her mind with playful sins, that she had now discovered to be pleasureful. It had only been a matter of time before one of us caved. "Oh come on Eli, I've seen you plenty of times before. You don't have to act so modest."

"Oh shush, just hand me the undersuit."

I handed her the black leather armor that she wore beneath the plate, that clung to her body tightly. Once it was on, she stretched her numb muscles. I opened the door and let the others in as I began to place the plate layers on her body. Allen shut the door behind him. First the chest piece, with silver underlying gold and crimson tinted sheets that adorned her bejeweled armor. I listened to Duncan explain what had occurred. Ander's had discovered my plan to free Elirina, due to his early sobering last night, thus allowing him to hear us throughout the evening. So I figured that Anders would be enraged by such an atrocity (in his eyes), and would assume that there was going to be an escape the next day. This embarrassed her greatly, her cheeks brightening. The others seemed unperturbed by such a fact. This caused her to freak silently and lean against a wall. Shame, again. It was heartbreaking, to be able to real her in sometimes... only to have her be repulsed and run away from me. It was like she wanted me to be by her, but she wanted the ability to move off whenever she wanted. And I really couldn't handle that. I couldn't handle her swaying heart, like a pendulum swinging from me to reality. Didn't she understand that I wanted to set her free from that? Reality was a silly thing, and she knew it. In fact, most humans recognize this feeling, because of they're ability to dream and produce goals and hopes. However, such things are easily crushed by outside forces or instability. Elirina was making me unstable, with her own internal conflict that plagued her. But that was life. You can't manipulate a person's emotions. What would life be, if we could? Uneventful, that's for sure.

Duncan's urgent voice recalled my memory. Right. Duncan, the Alliance, traitorous dogs, ya, I knew this story. But Elirina was panicking, simply because of the fact that everyone else was in trouble. Technically, only Allen and Elysia were "traitorous" as well. Elysia was the one who was helping my escape, by creating a portal to Shattrath, and Allen, for keeping watch and "getting rid of" those who tried to get near. But the elf fell into a fit of distress, anxious for how the day was going to plan out. It wasn't like she had several other options to consider. There were two only lives she could choose from here on out. She could go home, back to Orgrimmar, and be with her allies and soon to be husband, if the arrangement was still in tact after so long. Or, I would offer her to come with me, to run off to the Outlands and become outlaws. Not a very established or steady lifestyle, but rather a nomadic one. Inn to inn, or forest ground to crusted Earth, anywhere would be a home. Anywhere she wanted, where we wouldn't be tracked down. But most women wanted a form of stability, and she was certainly one of those kind of women.

"Look, I donna 'ave much time, Anders is furious. You have to leave quickly." And with that, he left to continue to distract Anders.

"Come on Eli, we have to get you out of here." Elysia said calmly, helping me by handing me scattered armor on the floor. The elf tried to speak, but was hushed by me, as I began to belt the pieces together, so that it fit together on her back. She clasped the bracers and belt on before slipping on the plate metal gloves. I then fitted the skirt on correctly, before tightening the straps for her. With the last piece of armor on, I stepped up and handed her backpack, only to pause. I had never seen her dressed in plate. It was decorated ornately, as one piece. Immaculately designed to shimmer with perfect lighting, silent and sleek in clandestine movement, it was suitable for a defender of light, whether she twisted it or not. I finally lifted her sword to her, the hilt outstretched. She took the blade, and lifted it up some, regaining the strength to hold it. It's point was dull and it had lost its sheen from being untended to. I helped her strap it to her back, so that it sat in place. Once everything was in place, she brushed the light dust off. She grunted from the weight, trying to gain balance.

"And you think cloth armor is irritating." She groaned, "Do you know how much weight I'm carrying?"

I smiled half-heartedly and quickly moved to the window, to estimate how long we would be until landing. "It looks like we're five minutes until the docks. Listen, you're going to have to climb out of the window, into the water. Anders won't be expecting us to go underwater, up to the sand. He'll be in the city, looking around for us. Eli, you're going to have to wear your helm. Should we get separated, run to the grassland, out of the city. Don't stop for anyone. Once you reach that area, wait up for the rest. Should all go well, Elysia will be making a portal to Shattrath for ourselves, and for you as well, Eli, if you want to come." I paused, eying her reaction. She wasn't looking at me, but rather the oakwood floor. I frowned, yet continued. "Elysia, you do know how to port to Shattrath, right?"

"Oh.. well, I've never actually made one. I don't honestly don't know if it goes to the right place or not. I know the correct markings to make one, but I a mage can never guarantee that it will –

"Whatever works."

"But! If things go haywire, and you get sent to some random place, you can, uh, always walk?"

Very reassuring indeed.

"Eli, your horse – "

"Should be there, waiting, when I call him. He is a demon, after all. Like any other, he can appear from shadows nearby."

We didn't have much time. Once the ship completely stopped, I let the elf climb out of the window and fall into the water. I really wasn't sure if she could even swim with such a heavy load to carry, so I jumped in second. I lifted her into my arms and pulled her to shore, making sure that she didn't slip from my fingers. The others followed, and I urged them to hurry. With her helm placed on, we ran off into the city, as elusive as possible. I turned to look at the Nostalgia once more, to see Duncan already conversing with his crew, while Anders was running with a temporary militia that would hunt us down. Clad in armor, he was barking orders to everyone in the area, commanding for them to help them search as well. Duncan did nothing to help the Knight Lieutenant, other than stay out of his way. Anders, as well had come to discover, was a force that needed to be let alone, or else things would become... difficult. I held onto Elirina's hand tightly, trying to not become divided. Division would only make things more complicated. After pushing through crowds, we reached the outskirts of town, about ten minutes ahead of Anders' men. We moved to a shady tree with a large trunk and underbrush, that concealed us for the most part. Allen and Elysia gave us our time, standing aside as she began to create the transportation drawing on the ground with arcane dust that would hopefully port us to the correct place.

From the other side of the tree, Elirina and I walked together slowly. She had already called upon her horse to her side. Gently she stroked its mane and forehead. She turned to me after. We didn't say anything for moments, which made me soon realize that we were wasting valuable time. Had she made a decision? Would she leave? Would she stay? Would she stay to be with me, or to simply run away from a predestined fate that was clearly wrong. But then again. What _was_ there to say. She had all the more right to leave, at least the other man could fulfill _her_ dreams.

When she removed her helm, I could see her expression clearly. She was afraid. Afraid of what, the unknown? What was so damned scary about the future? What was so horrifying, so terrible that could hold her back? I guessed the idea of not knowing what was next. An unpredictable life, was well, just that. You never knew what was going to happen, who you were going to meet, where you would end up. Some people couldn't handle that, and I had come to assume that she was one of those kind of people.

"Look... I won't force you to make a decision. I've already forced you to do enough. It's your future, I've already messed up alot of it for the most part."

Elirina said nothing, but rather touched my scarred cheek. I leaned my head into her palm, shutting my eyes. Such fingertips moved to my lips, preventing myself from saying anything. Her plate fingers were cold against me, almost uninviting.

"You were doing your job, I understand that now."

"But, it wasn't for the right reasons. I was doing the job for worthless things, petty items, unfulfillable things.. I shouldn't have – "

"Nicholas, just look at it like this. You're letting me go. That's more than I could ask for. You're giving me my own freedom to decide what to do, where to go." My chest was heaving, contorting into knots that stung me. "I appreciate how you've been for the past few weeks. You've been kind to me. There's a side of you, it's there... you do care and you are concerned for others. I really hope you find happiness; find it in the Outlands. I'm sure you will. There is a big heart in you, that needs to be used to the fullest potential. Although it took me forever to see it, I had a feeling that it was there. You don't need a silly dream to tell you how to view your future. It was... probably just the alcohol, anyways. You can't have it dictating your actions every step of the way."

Yes, but they were real, vivid dreams, that I held in my hands. I could see them, nearly feel them. They were that close to me. Alcohol never did that. But I could feel it slipping away through the cracks. "Of course, Elirina." I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "I'm guessing your decision is to go home. I figured as much, I just hoped that I could handle it better."

"I can't. Nicholas, I need to return to my world, even if it thinks I'm dead. There are people who care about me as well, people whom I've known longer than you, who won't believe that I'm gone. I can't leave them behind. They know me, they've been there for me during – "

And I narrowed my eyebrows. "So just because they've known you longer, means they deserve you? Just because I haven't been there since day one, means I'm not worthy of your attention? The hell to that! You're just afraid of the future." And I ended up exploding. So much was being held back, thoughts were spinning wicked webs in my mind, catching me in their grasp. Their talons were curled around my neck, scrapping gently for me to succumb. But it was her fault. _She_ was being the oblivious ones, _she_ was being the idiot! "I can't believe you. God, you're so pleased that your future is being planned out for you. Means you don't have to do any of the work, as if you were planning to do any anyways. You wouldn't know how to make a stable life on your own anyways." She stiffened up, shaking her head, trying to not listen to me. "But really... _Damnit, Eli,_ _we made love_! I was your first, and you enjoyed it. I don't know how that gets any more personal. I'm guessing that's a good ten years stacked ontop of my record because of that." She wasn't looking at me again, and I roughly pulled her face back. "But that means nothing, does it? What was I? Your own personal experiment? Is it just a game for you, now that I've nicened up? Think you can take advantage of that side of me? Well you're wrong. I'm still me, I'm still divided. But, you don't get it, do you? You don't care. I bet you love that elf that you're going to marry. I bet you chose him yourself out of a slew of elves at your disposal. You can't wait to earn the bragging rights with your friends, to be able to gossip all you want about whomever and whatever, and fuck whoever you want, because your husband and parents don't care. You don't care that your parents have an open marriage, because really?... Its just words, and two silly circles on their fingers. Whats the point? Its all ideal. It means nothing, so that's just the ticket to doing anything. Right? You can't wait to make mommy and daddy so proud, by obeying them, and walking down some aisle, with your fancy gown, and you're sparkling eyes. It'll be everything you've always wanted, because you're just a spoiled brat, afterall..." I paused, clutching her chin tightly, digging my nails into her skin. I was disgusted, caught up in how she repulsed the very idea of being with me."You know, I really thought that there was something there. I really thought I was doing the best thing for you, by letting you make your own decision. But really, you don't know what it is. You don't even know what love is. You just think its a handsome face, or simple words of endearment. No, sweetie, love is several things. It's loyalty, honesty and trust. You don't sleep around, when you've given your word to that other person. You don't lie, or try to make up excuses. You tell the damned truth. You don't marry someone because you just want permission to do as you please, you do it because you earnestly love them."

She was offended now, pushing me away and crossing her arms, standing her ground. But what else was there? Fake tears glistening her cheek? Was she frightened by me? Afraid that I would curse her flesh with agony? She yelled back at me, trying to get out of my grasp. "Oh? And you think you know a thing about love? Look at you, making a pathetic definition of love, when you've never been in a lasting relationship, only with your courtesans and succubus! You're always too drunk to be in tune with reality, you're so oblivious to the world around you, that you think everything's fine and dandy, when it isn't. I'm sure you've broken plenty of hearts in the past, with your cold and downright vile behavior. I'm sure you've stripped women to pieces because they didn't want you that way, or when they discovered the real you! You're just a sick fiend, who's obsessed with a fantasy. Well wake up! You told me yourself that the world isn't roses and dandelions. You said that the strongest survive. Well, I want to survive. You think I want to marry a slob like him? Erannar? Really? That pretentious, good for nothing sloth? Why, I'd rather drink ectoplasm and just become apart of the scourge!"

"I heard what you said. You obviously want him, over me. Why? You said it yourself. You want to make it in this world, you don't want to be alone. Well fine, have fun. Good riddance." And scowled and shook my head. "I just hope to God that when you get knocked up, and are pregnant, that you have a miscarriage. We don't need any more fuckin elves in this world."

She gasped and stared at me. Her mouth hung agape at my words, until she slapped me head on, leaving a piercing red mark on my stinging cheek. "How dare you, how dare you say such a spiteful thing! You hardly know the man – "

"And you're still not denying that you at least have feelings for him." I quietly spoke. She couldn't reply. "It's quite alright. I've heard this story too many times myself. It's because he's so handsome. You're attracted to him physically, and looking at me is like vomiting and smearing it on your face. I'm hideous, I know.. You don't need to deny it. I'm sure he has a perfect body, scar-free, unburned. Sleek chest, toned muscles. Strong arms, that magically cradle you with affection. He gets you whatever you want, leans on your very whims. Gets you roses and chocolates, trying to win over your love? Oh, let me guess, he's also a paladin, so he has that edge on you as well. Was I really your first, when you could have been with him? Come on, you need not hide it. How's he in bed? Does he just make your skin tingle with ecstasy? "

"Oh, shush! I'm not some tramp that throws herself at men. I have some form of dignity. And why do you care anyways?"

"I told you."

"Well, remind me!"

"You didn't care enough to remember it. If you truly did, you would understand my point of view, you would have remembered." I stuttered when speaking, feeling my heart crush in her hands. She simply forgot...that I loved her, that I didn't want to let her go. And I had told her. "But you're a hedonist, just like me. You've discovered a new venue for pleasure, and you can't wait to test it out with this other man."

"And are you jealous? Are you jealous of someone who is more appealing to look at?"

"I'm perfectly comfortable with what happened to me. There's nothing I can do to change it, so why fuss?" But I did care. I cared because I wanted to look as normal as I could, so that her eyes wouldn't wander. I wanted to fulfill her every need, kneel at her every whim, succumb to her own desires, and in the end, I just wanted to be told "I love you" hotly and dearly, with honesty and sincerity. That's all I needed. But here she was. Slandering all of it to tiny specs, cutting out my heart with her blade. "You just don't get it." I shook my head, and pushed her back against the tree trunk. She glared at me thoroughly with hatred and contempt. I didn't expect her to know, in the end. She was blissfully lost in translation, moving back into reality after last night. She probably had fallen asleep before hearing me whisper those words in her ear. But it didn't matter. I could stake my claim right then and there, even if I looked like an ass while trying to do so.

With venom coating my tongue, I uttered into her ear, "You'll never feel this way again. Not with him." And with that, I crashed down onto her lips and molded with her. I grasped her face to me, combating her struggles. She was trying so hard to uphold her own values, until she caved in and returned her velvet lips to me. Her hands grasped my hair, and nearly... just nearly, she was losing herself. She swallowed her pride with a hard gulp... and I swore I had her under my reigns, that she was mine now. That I was winning her over. But that notion faded when she pushed me away forcefully and shook her head. "No, you're just a hypocrite. Don't preach to me about love. Look at you, you're manipulating me. If you really cared, you wouldn't be doing this to me. You wouldn't be making me choose! You would accept this, you would – "

"And I am letting you decide." I replied, rubbing my burning cheek that she hit. "Oh come on! I'm only asking that you leave for the right reasons! Don't leave because you can't wait to get home to Mommy and Daddy who have been oh so worried about you, as they share a bed with another person. Don't leave because you've lied to me all this time about you not liking this guy you're supposed to marry. At least do it for the right reasons. At least leave because you want to live your own life, make your own decisions and break free from your arranged marriage. I thought I was giving you that option, but I guess I was wrong... At least leave because being with me would be traitorous, at least have that kind of honor and loyalty to your people."

"And those are my reasons...Nicholas, I've been cluttered with thoughts, ideas, visions and possibilities. There are so many scenarios in my head, so many ways that this could have gone about. I want to see the world, fight for the Horde, bring honor to my people. I want to see if there's more to life than this. I want to find someone who loves me, not just for my body, but respects me for my dreams and aspirations. I want to be treated like an individual, I want to make sense of things! … Look, I know those seem silly in your eyes, but I really... I really need to grow up some before I pack up and permanently leave Azeroth. As I said before, who knows. Maybe you'll find someone who can make you happier than you've ever been before. Maybe you'll find some kind of meaning to your life, beyond this lifestyle thus far."

Before I could reply, Allen walked into my eyesight, calling us both over. "The portals ready. Elysia says you have a few minutes before it expires."

I nodded, walking over to where the portal hovered. Elysia and Allen were about to walk through, saying their goodbyes to Elirina, should she be leaving. "You aren't staying in Azeroth, either of you?"

"We're leaving with Nicholas in order to make sure he finds standings in Shattrath. Its a very divided city, and you have to keep your eyes pealed. I personally am aligned with the Aldor and Allen is neutral. Most likely Nicholas will be neutral as well, but first we have to show him to the right people. Plus, Allen and I were interested in the market areas. There are some rare, exotic findings there, that you cannot find anywhere else."

Elirina nodded, looking to me. "It's your choice whether you come or stay. Either way, I give my complete and honest word when I say, that I will never forget you, and will never be able to move on. Quite frankly, its my nature. I have a fond memory of those I care about. Elirina, if you didn't realize it yet, I'm obsessed with that dream. It's nagged me day in and day out. I know its plagued you as well, and I know you're confused. But know this, I will always, although it may seem obscure or wrong, love you."

And with that final note, I handed her the Alliance papers as she stared dumbfound at me. "Do as you will with them. I honestly don't care what happens because of them. I was only in it for the money."

I waved casually, and walked into the portal before it closed into thin air.

* * *

What could be done, of such silly emotions? Why did a being above grant all beings the ability to feel things, to sense right or wrong, or to grasp the uncertain? I myself would have to call this ruler of all things, our creator... he's a very selfish person, who is merely seeking entertainment. You see, these things... emotions, why, they're quite peculiar. I've always found that by sealing up such sparks as like a bomb ticking away. Eventually, it explodes into something, good or by, depending on what it is. It's rather confusing, intriguing, but very, very peculiar indeed. But I must admit, this being... he's smart. This thing knows their comedy. They know their creation inside and out, they know what makes us tick, they know how to pinch us, cripple us... They know how to make things more interesting. But life's a mystery, who knows, honestly.

Yet in all the years of my short life, I had never felt as empty as this. Beyond that, I felt like a complete ass. Laying on the cool stone ground of Shattrath, I stared up at the covering of the large area. I sat up, rubbing my head, as I had been tossed out of thin air towards the ground. I guess nothing hurt as much as my burn, every once in awhile, but I had a massive headache. Groaning, I stood up, brushing the dust off my robe before calling my Fel Hunter to my side. "Chii, locate Elysia for me." The creation craned its head to look, just as its thorn tipped tethers began to move into the air. Like a dog locating a scent, the demon ran off into the direction I had ordered of it. I followed slowly, taking my time to look at the city's layout, watching as vagabonds and refugees walked about, begging more well off citizens for a spare bite of food, or some copper. There were an assortment of people, ranging from ethereal men of metal and light, to birds that walked on two feet. It was extremely different in comparison to Azeroth, it was so outlandish, I understood the title for the land finally. Everything was different; the languages, the factions, and the people themselves. But none of it contained Elirina.

She seemed so far away, so beyond my reach. In just a few days, she'd remeet her companions, and soon to be husband, in that, he had waited for her. Denied her death or capture, and was waiting loyally. If so, then maybe there was a chance for him, if he had such patience to wait for a gal like her. Maybe she was right. Maybe there was depth to such a possibility, that such dreams... were just that. Dreams. But I had only recently come to the conclusion that they could become real, but there she was, denying it all, calling it lies... just a blissful atrocity for her. But that's all it was now. A kind of nostalgia that I couldn't understand, something that ignored the rules of reality. At least, at the very, very least... she could be happy.

* * *

_End of Blind Nostalgia._

**AN**: Finished Act I of this series. Act II will be coming shortly, after I finish my school finals. Please, feel free to review to give me ideas or insight about the story. I feel bad for making you, my readers, wait so long for one chapter that's tiny. I really hope I'm not slacking at all. Either way, questions, coments, concerns, the usual...


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